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12th September 2016
09:48am BST
:Extremely Triple H voice: Are you ready?
The Miz's Intercontinental tour continues
We have no idea what level of irony to work on with The Miz. Is he good now because he was hated for ages and now it's cool and contrarian to enjoy him? Is he good now because despite his functional in-ring work, he's managed to build a surprisingly captivating character? Is he good now because he's really, REALLY good on the mic? Or is he still the same old Miz, but now we're older and wiser we just *get it* now.
Arsene Wenger once said about Emile Heskey words to the effect of, "His talent has remained the same. It's your perception of his talent that has changed."
The Miz is WWE's Heskey. Once raw and clumsy, sometimes hated, but altogether an under appreciated cult favourite. We're glad he retained.
Heath Slater can feed his kids again
With only the faintest hyperbole, Heath Slater has been the best thing about WWE for the past six weeks. Unsigned in the draft, the one-man band made chicken salad out of chicken shit and turned himself into one of the most alluring characters in wrestling.
You wanted Slater to win the Tag Team tournament. You wanted him to finally get signed to SmackDown. You wanted him to 'earn' that contract so he can feed his surprisingly numerous family.
That Slater did it with ECW legend Rhyno and then promised to buy his wife a double-wide trailer as a gift only added to the win.
Now do a heel turn please.
Bray Wyatt is doing... something
One day it will all click. One day Bray Wyatt will combine his menacing on-mic skills with his impressive ring work and find himself an opponent worthy of building a decent story around. One day he'll get given the chance to be something other than a jobber to the stars. One day he'll be allowed to fight someone other than Kane and start living out all of those amazing tales people fantasy book him in.
One day.
The new Women's Champion is straight fire.
WWE has a new Women's Champion and she's Irish. Taking part in the six-pack elimination women's match against Naomi, Natalya, Alexa Bliss, Carmella and Nikki Bella, Becky ran away with the gold after locking Carmella in the Dis-Arm-Her.
As chants of "You Deserve It" rained down from the crowd, the other members of the Four Horsewomen took to social media to congratulate Becky. WWE now has two fully formed women's divisions, both packed with talent and amazing storytelling potential. We can't wait.
We have a new World Champion
Eight months. That's how long AJ Styles has been in the WWE. Eight months. Eight months to become one of the hottest stars in the company and become the WWE World Champion. It's weird thinking of the 39-year-old ring veteran as the face of a 'new' era in wrestling, but in beating Dean Ambrose for the title on Sunday, AJ Styles cemented himself as one of the biggest names in wrestling going forward.
Well earned. What a man. What a haircut. *walks around the office to his theme song*
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