Make the most of the weekend, folks. It could (but almost certainly won’t) be one of the last regular weekends humankind sees…
Yes, that’s right, the world is set to end (again): a particularly cruel blow to those of us who have already paid upfront for our office Christmas parties…
As pointed out by the Daily Mail, a number of conspiracy theorists reckon September 23 will mark the beginning of the apocalypse. They point to a Biblical prophecy laid out in the Book of Revelation, which claims that ‘worthy’ Christians will be spared and lifted to heaven by Jesus using a a large crane while unworthy Christians and the rest of the human race will be left to deal with the end of the world. We made the crane bit up.
An apocalyptic theory known as Revelation 12 Signs will soon be fulfilled with the appearance of, ahem, ‘a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet and a crown of twelve stars on her head.’ What a load of shite.
As there always seems to be with these kind of theories, there’s mention of how some astronomical alignment involving the Leo and Virgo constellations and a few planets will fulfil this prophecy – the woman is Virgo, the crown of stars in Leo.
Websites promoting this latest theory claim that the apocalypse will take around seven years, with the Antichrist fucking shit up for the remaining members of mankind left on Planet Earth throughout this time period.
Reassuringly, other members of Christianity have rejected the claims, saying the ‘prophecy’ has been misinterpreted. We’re willing to side with them on this one.
