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01st Jul 2017

Ranking the 15 best weapons from the classic N64 game GoldenEye 007

Greatest word ever? Deathmatch

Paul Moore

What. A. Game. Remember these weapons?

There are certain iconic video games that instantly make you feel nostalgic and GoldenEye 007 on the N64 is definitely one of them.

The superb first-person shooter was released in ’97 and it has since gone down as one of the most important releases in video game history. More importantly, it also provided us with more hours of fun with our friends than we could ever articulate.


Even hearing the names of the deathmatch arenas like Frigate, Archives, Bunker, Caverns and Facility still make us giddy with nostalgia. The game sold eight million copies worldwide and the fantastic weapons were a big reason why.

Here are our 15 favourite weapons in reverse order. Agree?

15) Unarmed

The last act of a desperate man in a deathmatch, BUT we all feared being caught low on ammo.

In this case, as Ron Burgundy would say, you’ve still got Jack Johnson and Tom O’Leary waiting for your mates, but you were usually killed off with a hail of bullets.

This being said, there was still no worse feeling than having your mates kill you in a deathmatch with their bare hands.

Cue endless slagging.

14) DD44 Dostovei

This was the gun of choice for most of those green-suited Russian officers and we always loved the dual-firing capabilities of this bad boy.

The gun mainly has a place in our hearts because scientists usually drew a DD44 if they were shot twice in the leg and then ignored.

We loved torturing those guys.


13) Cougar Magnum

This monster was louder than an atomic bomb, so not ideal for stealth, but its coil and reloading mechanisms were slower than Per Mertesacker.

All things considered, there was no bigger thrill than shooting a guard with this beast and almost blowing them into next week with the sheer force.

Seeing that impact was almost worth bringing the wrath of every single guard into your location.


12) Throwing Knife

You don’t need bullets to kill a man and proficiency with this weapon really separated the men from the boys in a deathmatch.

Guile, craft and cunning were needed.

Did anyone prefer the hunting knives?


11) Golden Gun

If you had to judge GoldenEye by real-life standards, then this gun was the most accurate of them all because all it required was one shot to die.

Francisco Scaramanga’s weapon of choice did take some of the fun out of having a lengthy deathmatch, but there was a giddy buzz if you were the character that were in possession of it.

Hounding down your mates like a rabid dog and seeing them run for their lives provided endless laughs.


10) Moonraker Laser

Let’s be honest, the watch laser was a bit crap because it required your enemies to be about two inches from your face to inflict any serious damage, but this version was pretty decent.

No magazine, no ammo, no problems, because this beast could also shoot through doors.

Poor Bond, he never stood a chance against Jaws.

9) KF7 Soviet

This was probably the most popular gun in the whole game because it struck a lovely balance between long-distance shooting, decent firepower, quantity of bullets and target control.

We’re proud to admit that we killed so many people with this weapon AND we don’t have any remorse.

It did look like a fancy crayon though.

KF7 Soviet-Game

8) Silenced PP7

This was the weapon that separated the ‘real’ MI6 agents from those chancers who just wanted to go bullet-crazy and fire their guns at anything that moved.

There was no better feeling than quietly tip-toeing up behind a guard and shooting them in the head.

This footage is pure nostalgia.

7) AR33 Assault Rifle

Power, power and even more power.

Did we mention that it’s powerful?

6) Hand Grenade

You can’t measure just how much fun it is to throw one of these badboys at your mates and seeing the look of sheer panic on their faces as they scramble to evacuate.

This was even better if the room contained barrels of petrol.

If you were very skilled then you knew how to hold onto them and then throw – thus making detonation happen sooner – but the best kills were with those oil barrels.



5) Sniper Rifle

There’s nothing quite as exhilarating as picking off someone from a distance because they never even saw it coming.


We could listen to this noise all day long. The weapon of choice for a cold, ruthless and cunning killer.

4) Tank

One of life’s simpler pleasures was obtained by squashing hundreds of nameless henchmen like ants via this behemoth of a vehicle.

Those screams combined with this firepower is just awesome.

The single-player mission in Russia was mega.

Just look at that firepower!

3) RC-P90

Is it weird that we always pictured Hank Scorpio from The Simpsons firing this gun while laughing maniacally?

This absolute beast of a weapon probably fired off around 200 bullets per second as it mowed down anything in its path.

All the fun starts at the 0:50 mark here. Two of these in your hands and you would feel indestructible.

This is just great.

2) Rocket Launcher

As the saying goes, “there are no friends in a deathmatch”, and while your friends can run, it’s impossible for them to hide.

Nothing could ever top the sheer devastation that a well-fired rocket would cause.

Total. Firey. Carnage.

Take a look at the bottom player in this game. What a hit.

1) Proximity and remote mines

Like a fly that lands into a spider’s web, there was no better feeling than seeing your poor pals walk into their imminent death via a trap that you carefully planned.

The best kills in GoldenEye were calculated, cunning and cold.

You lay the trap, they walk into it.


Images via – Goldeneye Wikipedia