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17th May 2018

USA Soccer Guy’s pre-game preview of the Scotch Cup Final between the Celtics and Momwell

'The Celtics will have a whole city behind them'

Soccer Guy

Self-proclaimed ‘soccer expert’ USA Soccer Guy (on Facebook and Twitter) returns to give us a unique preview of this weekend’s Scottish – err, sorry, ‘Scotch’ – Cup final from across the pond.

The Glasgow Celtics will have a whole city behind them when they take on Momwell in Saturday’s Scotch FA Cup soccer final in what promises to be another historic day in the history of soccer history.

The Ghuys already have their fingers inside a new set of EPL Scotland World Championship rings, but will hope to go add another cup to their trophy shack when they take on the healthy mom-named franchise at Hampton Park this weekend.

The Celtics – named after the Boston-based NBA franchise – finished the Scotch season way out in front of a whole bunch of other teams, including BFF franchise the Glasgow Raiders. The two franchises from across the Scotch capital play regularly in the Old Friends Derby, a soccer match where fans of both teams sing a bunch of songs about how great it is to hang out together and be such great buddies.

Coach Rodgers will hope that Awesome Edwards, the goalshot inserter they borrowed from PSG Eindhoven last summer, will be back in time to play soccer after getting kinda hurt at soccer practice.

As the seventh winningest franchise in Scotland, many might expect Momwell to get their asses handed to them with fries when the clock strikes soccer o’clock this weekend. However, after beating Abbadeen last time out in the semi-final, these guys will have a dream that this could be the year they quit being lame and finally go get a soccer cup.

They head on into the game with the Celtics with just two Ls in their last ten soccer games, their deefense keeping the scoresheets unstained in five of their last seven games. If they can find a way of scoring more than the Celtics at Hampton on Saturday, they’re almost guaranteed to win.

Although it’s undeniafiable that the Celtics will start this one as the favorites to take the three points, soccer fans will know that when there’s a cup on the line, you can never rule out a giant homicide.