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17th Oct 2016

USA Soccer Guy’s pregame preview for Liver Pool Vs Manchester Unity

Two American-owned English soccer franchises meet today.

Soccer Guy

The major talking point of this week’s EPL League fixtures has undeniafiably been Bob Bradley’s first game coaching soccer to the Seaswans but there’s another humongous soccer game that’s got British guys real pumped this weekend.

Coach Bradley yells at his guys to do better deefense as the Soccer Canons look to go score Coach Bradley yells at his guys to do better deefense as the Soccer Canons look to go score

Monday’s EPL League sundown soccer sees the Manchester Unity head on over to Liver Pool, in one of the most eagerly anticipized games in the entire world.

Despite historically being the two winningest, most trophied franchises in the history of English soccer history, the Unity and the Pool owe pretty much all of their success and world-famous names to their American owners, who both made them way better than they were before.

Liver Pool, who welcome the Soccer Satans to Mercytown, have started the season pretty good and will be looking to score more goalshots than Juan Mourinho’s guys if they’re gonna go get the W. As for the Unity’s Portugaleze coach, he’ll be looking to go show the world that he’s still the Special Juan, after a load of guys said some real mean stuff about how lame he is at coaching soccer.

Juan Mourinho, goofin around with a soccer ball making two Liverpool players real madJuan Mourinho, goofin around with a soccer ball making two Liverpool players real mad

Although Mourinho is kinda famous for ‘parking the Greyhound’ when he heads to Liver Pool, he’s got the players on his roster to make Liver Pool’s deefense look like a bunch of dumbass kids that need to go back to kindergarten and have their teacher read some books to them about doing better deefense.

Take Zlatan Abramovic, for example.  Pretty old now, he arrived in the summer franchise enhancement from PSV, and will be looking to open up a can of awesome right inside the Liver Pool danger box zone when the clock strikes soccer o’clock this afternoon. Dwayne Rooney is expected to be subshacked for the away franchise, but Irish guy Mick O’Taryan could bet set to lace up his cleats for the full 90 minutes plus overtime.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic kicks the goal pipes Zlatan Abramovic kicks the goal pipes

For the home franchise, Adam Lalaland may get to play after he got hurt last week while Daniel Stowage may also be up against Biggie Smalling and the rest of the Unity deefense. With a whole bunch of offense on his roster, time will tell if Coach Klopp can make room for Stowage.

Enjoy the game, soccer fans.

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