England release three new kits and they're all beautiful
Alexa, play Three Lions, '98
England have announced the release of three new football kits, and all the accompanying training gear, ahead of the UEFA Nations League games next weekend.
The home kit is the most subtle and least eye-catching, but does hark back to the iconic England kits of the mid to late 1990s, with the crest in the middle.
This might seem like coincidence but look at the font used for the names and numbers and tell me you don't see Michael Owen wheeling away against Argentina having just run through their defence like a hot knife through butter.
The blue away shirt is somewhat rare for England, though there have been two since 2010 - one released for Euro 2012 worn in the 3-2 win over Sweden and one released in 2017 only ever worn once by the team.
This shirt is more royal blue than those examples, the badge is predominantly red and the not so subtle pattern makes it the prime candidate for the shirt donned by every single male on a lad's holiday in Ibiza.
— England (@England) September 1, 2020
The red shirt, as seen below worn by Jadon Sancho, also has a feint pattern underneath its vibrant red colour, something becoming increasingly common in modern kits and that already featured on the Lionesses kit at the 2019 World Cup. The blue patches on the crew neck collar are a lovely addition too.
As well as the kits, a whole batch of training gear has been released, including the jazziest jacket you've ever seen, as worn by Tammy Abraham above, which you can buy for £84.95.
Yeah, that's the elephant in the room. As nice as these kits are, they are not cheap. At the moment, an adult's England's home shirt with no name or number costs a whopping £69.95. If you want the 'Vapor' version - identical to the hi-tech versions the players actually wear as opposed to a replica - you're looking at more than £100. But why would you do that? Don't do that. You're not a footballer.