With all due respect to the artistic vision, wtf did I just watch?
Ed Sheeran’s got a new music video out. This one is for ‘Happier’, a song which surprisingly does not seem to centre around happiness.
He’s taken a different direction with this video, employing the use of puppets and balloon people as opposed to regular humans.
Regardless of your thoughts on the video, I think we can all agree that puppet Ed Sheeran isn’t a strong representation of real life Ed Sheeran’s face.
Here’s a brief synopsis of what is sure to be one of the most insane music videos you’re ever going to see.
The puppet version of Ed Sheeran is a very generous replica of real life Ed Sheeran
The story begins with Ed’s balloon lover leaving him for a giant ball of red fluff. Ironically, the red fluff ball looks more like Ed Sheeran than the Ed Sheeran puppet does
We see that Puppet Ed Sheeran wears a watch, which makes perfect sense because puppets are notorious for needing to keep track of the time, especially when heartbroken
Puppet Ed Sheeran drowns his sorrows with some non-branded Bourbon Whiskey alone by candlelight, having scattered nuts upon the table top which shows that his puppet paws are no match for the intricate little salty snacks
In a flashback scene, puppet Ed Sheeran’s balloon lady gets too close to a cactus and loses an arm, which is easily the best moment of the entire video
Puppet Ed Sheeran lies in a sea of photographs, biscuits, crumbs and a guitar because he is sad and that is what sad puppets do
Drunk puppet Ed Sheeran daydreams about beating the living Christ out of his ex’s new boyfriend (whilst wearing a watch)
Heartbroken puppet Ed Sheeran busks his frustrations away, accompanied by the most tragic handmade sign of all time
In another flashback, puppet Ed Sheeran and his ex dance closely under the night sky, presumably to stop her from floating away
Some children try to steal puppet Ed Sheeran’s ex, but he comes to the rescue shouting obscenities that in retrospect were unsuitable for their young ears
Back to the present, puppet Ed Sheeran gets mad at some balloon fixtures, probably because they remind him of his balloon ex
In a heartbreaking finale, puppet Ed Sheeran’s ex’s new boyfriend KILLS HER by letting go of her safety string. He also maintains eye contact the entire time
Balloon lady floats away to her untimely death, realising that she’d made a huge mistake and should never have left puppet Ed Sheeran for red fluffy guy
Puppet Ed Sheeran is gutted and still looks absolutely nothing like real life Ed Sheeran
Moral of the story: If you’re going to turn yourself into a puppet, you will not find love unless your puppet self looks somewhat like your human self.
All images via YouTube