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Food

14th Apr 2018

Coca-Cola are launching first ever official slushie

This is not a drill

Kyle Picknell

Sweet baby Jesus it’s actually happening.

Our prayers have been answered, ladies and gentlemen, and Coca-Cola have decided to launch the first ever official Coke slushie to delight our tastebuds and more than likely, freeze our brains. Perhaps temporarily, perhaps forever.

The new frozen variant of the iconic soft drink brand will be released on the 16th of April, but only in Japan.

I know I know. I’m sorry. I really am. It’s not good news for us hardcore ice blasters over here in the UK, but let’s be honest, it’s still very exciting news in the big, bad world of slushie innovation.

As you can see, the resfreshing-as-fuck looking concoction comes in a nifty looking pouch for anyone wanting pounding brain freezes on the go, perhaps whilst your hungover on the tube or during a particularly dull meeting where everyone else is drinking coffee. You know, something to take your mind off the relentless pain of existence.

Infused with a hint of lemon, the drink will cost 130 yen, and as I am not Japanese, I have no idea how much that is. A quid, roughly? You have Google, you can figure it out.

Recently Coca-Cola Japan also announced that they will also be experimenting with alcoholic drinks. Whether that leads to slushies you can get absolutely trollied from remains to be seen.

Until then, yes, yes I will be moving to Japan. Indefinitely. It was nice knowing you. Actually it wasn’t.