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08th Feb 2018

This police sketch somehow resulted in a suspect being identified and it wasn’t Karl Pilkington

They've got the wrong man

JOE

Behold the most questionable piece of artwork since Fresco Jesus.

Pennsylvania’s police department miraculously were able to use the following image to identify the suspect involved in a theft:

Based on the overall shape of the face, fear in its eyes and overall vacant expression, it doesn’t take a genius to work out who this person is.

Clearly, it’s Karl Pilkington, but the Lancaster Police Department have identified him as this guy:

Pilkington is still at large, but they’ve charged 44-year-old Hung Phuoc Nguyen with theft and have issued a warrant for his arrest.

The drawing was apparently done by a witness and genuinely appears to have helped them in tracking down their guy:

“While the sketch provided by the witness may have appeared amateurish and cartoonish, it, along with the distinctive physical descriptors, jogged the memory of at least one investigator to provide a potential suspect name. That potential suspect information was passed on to Off. Rothermel.  A photo array was prepared and later shown to the witness that provided Off. Rothermel with the description and sketch”.

 

If I may, I have some questions for witness that produced the drawing:

1. Are you a toddler?

2. Have you ever seen a human man before?

3. Did you draw the sketch in a fast-moving vehicle on a bumpy road?

4. Have you ever seen eyes, a nose or a mouth before?

5. Are you Banksy?

 

Until we get some answers, we must acknowledge that Karl Pilkington has gotten off lightly here. His days are numbered.

Topics:

Police