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11th Jun 2018

Love Island conspiracy theorists believe Love Island UK and Love Island Australia will join forces to create a super villa

In their quest to lower the IQ of both countries by a good five percentage points

Oli Dugmore

They’re both filmed in Majorca and there is potential for a muggy takeover

If you ever felt alone. If you ever felt rejected. If you ever felt confused. Then Love Island AU is probably not the place for you.

Cos I’m telling you, they’re fully fledged mad cunts.

Similar standard of contestant, similar amount of clothing, similar snarky narration. It’s basically the same show but, like, an Australian version. Funny that.

So, consider these thematic commonalities and then consider that both Love Island UK and Love Island Australia are FILMED IN MAJORCA. There are plenty of islands near Australia, why Spain? And if that’s not sufficient evidence, one must only account for the show’s producers’ love of introducing rival tribes (villas) to proceedings and, well, this is basically a dead cert. Isn’t it?

Imagine the state of the recouplings. The emotional brutality with an extra layer of pom rivalry. Chaos akin to the bloody fields of the Somme.

Whoever’s responsible for making it happen would do well to remember the creator of the atomic bomb Robert Oppenheimer’s immortal words, quoting the Bhagavad Gita, when the magnitude of his creation dawned on him: “Now I am become death, destroyer of worlds.”

With great power, comes great responsibility.


Love Island