Callum Hudson-Odoi was subjected to racist abuse twice in 11 days Chelsea have offered counselling to teenage forward Callum Hudson-Odoi after he was subjected to racist abuse twice in 11 days: during Chelsea’s Europa League game against Dynamo Kiev and again whilst away on England duty. Hudson-Odoi made his full debut for his country in […]

7 years ago

You won’t be able to drive more than 70mph in a new car in the UK past 2022 Speed limiting technology looks set to be fitted on all new vehicles sold in Europe from 2022, after new rules were provisionally agreed by the European Union. According to The Department for Transport, the system would also apply […]

7 years ago

This really shows the scale of the protest An estimated one million people turned out for the People’s Vote march in London on Saturday, making it the largest protest since the Iraq War march in 2003. Hundreds of thousands were expected, but the actual attendance figure appears to have far exceeded that with the protest’s […]

7 years ago

He was on the ‘world’s most wanted’ list Shane O’Brien, one of Britain’s most wanted fugitives, has been arrested in Romania after years on the run. The 31-year-old is suspected of murdering Josh Hanson, who was stabbed to death aged 21 in a bar in Hillingdon, west London, in 2015. He is believed to have […]

7 years ago

Stevie G has still got it, even in slow motion Former Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard rolled back the years on Saturday with a brilliant solo goal in front of the Kop to win a charity game for Liverpool Legends against – who else – AC Milan. Gerrard played a one-two with former pace merchant Djibril […]

7 years ago

Fifa Ultimate Team has also converted Zlatan Ibrahimovic into a centre back and Mo Salah into a left back for some reason As you almost certainly know by now, Liverpool fans think the sun shines out of Virgil Van Dijk’s arse. Do you know what? Maybe they’re right. Maybe it does. After all, he is […]

7 years ago

Ryan Giggs doesn’t like Arsenal, just in case you were wondering Wales manager and former Manchester United winger Ryan Giggs has opened up about his ‘intense dislike’ of Arsenal, and four Arsenal players in particular, during an interview with the Daily Mail. Surprisingly, classic shithouser Martin Keown is nowhere to be seen with Giggs instead […]

7 years ago

Over 4 million signatures and it’s still growing The online petition calling on the government to revoke Article 50 and cancel Brexit has become the most popular petition in Parliamentary history with 4,244,520 signatures at the time of writing. Created in late February, the petition has the highest rate of sign-ups on record according to the official Petitions Committee. A petition […]

7 years ago

Nothing is sacred Draw a Venn diagram of Marmite and peanut butter and you’d find my own personal X, not in the central overlap of the two spheres, but fucked somewhere right off the page entirely with all the boring, boring jam and butter appreciators. As someone who is not particularly fond of Marmite, or […]

7 years ago

“2-0 down against Brighton. No disrespect to Brighton, but who the fuck are Brighton blud? Am I a prick fam? Am I a dickhead now blud?” – Troopz, Brighton 2 Arsenal 1 Football, they say, is a game of opinions. We are usually told this as a matter of fact, rather than opinion, but fundamentally […]

7 years ago

Adam Johnson has been released from Moorland Prison Convicted paedophile Adam Johnson has been released from prison after serving half of a six-year term. Johnson, 31, was sentenced to six years in prison for engaging in sexual activity with a 15-year-old girl in March 2016. His trial at Bradford Crown Court heard how he kissed […]

7 years ago

Fair play to the ultras, turning out in support of PSG’s women’s team just as they would for the men Weapons, fireworks and drugs, the holy trinity for any self-respecting football hooligan, were found on board a coach carrying Paris Saint-Germain supporters to their Champions League tie against Chelsea Women on Thursday night. The weapons […]

7 years ago

The worrying reality of Brexit – it may actually never end So here we are then, squinting our eyes, trying desperately to scan the consuming black dark for the thin rays of light to guide us out of all that is Brexit, now the artist formerly known as Brexit. Britain’s stormy, jilted-lover ‘don’t you dare […]

7 years ago

The Google Stadia will allow users to stream games onto any screen – PC, TV, phone or tablet Google has unveiled its new digital gaming platform, the Google Stadia, which will allow users to stream better-than-console-quality games onto any device. The company says it will revolutionise the gaming industry when it hits the market. The […]

7 years ago

Barcelona have been circling Griezmann for some time What could you buy for £100 million? A lot of things, probably, but arguably none better at football than Antoine Griezmann. So, in a weird way, yes, yes this is a bargain. This is like that really nice jacket in Zara you’ve been eyeing up for months […]

7 years ago

If only… there was… some kind of… vaccination for chickenpox… We sincerely regret to inform you that Italian politician Massimiliano Fedriga, a prominent anti-vaccination figure in the country, has been treated in hospital after contracting chicken pox. Fedriga, who is a senior member of the far-right League party, has been a vocal critic of the […]

7 years ago

Well this is a new one Xherdan Shaqiri, who hasn’t made an appearance for Liverpool since coming on as a substitute during their 0-0 draw against Manchester United on February 24, has withdrawn from the Switzerland squad due to an ‘inflammation of the pubic area’. Yikes. The Kosovan-born winger, who has 78 caps and 22 […]

7 years ago

If the launch of the Greggs vegan sausage roll is anything to go by this will infuriate lots of weird young men for absolutely no reason at all Imagine… imagine getting trolled by food. That’s the reality some people live in. Getting trolled by food. That’s actually part of their life: popping a bulging forehead […]

7 years ago

Very on brand behaviour from the West Ham midfielder Former Arsenal goalkeeper Wojciech Szczesny has revealed some very, very interesting anecdotes about his former teammates during an interview with Polish football journalists Łukasz Wiśniowski and Kuba Polkowski on their YouTube channel ‘Foot Truck’. The Juve stopper had something to say about everyone from Gervinho (barely […]

7 years ago

An absolutely outrageous decision A family court judge has banned a couple from giving their child, born in November last year, the first name “Griezmann Mbappé”, as reported by France Bleu Limousin. The case arose in early November, just months after France’s successful World Cup campaign, when a couple went to the civil services in […]

7 years ago

She was a regular guest at former Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi’s sex parties A Moroccan-born model who attended the infamous bunga-bunga dinners of former Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi has died in hospital, allegedly killed by radioactive poisoning. Imane Fadil, 33, died in a Milan hospital on March 1, a month after being admitted […]

7 years ago

We regret to inform you that Nigel Farage will no longer be walking all the way from Sunderland to London on his weird Brexit march Nigel Farage has let down the 350 people who signed up to his Brexit Betrayal March – a 200-mile walk from Sunderland to London – after admitting that he will […]

7 years ago

Fraser Anning blamed the Christchurch shooting on immigration Fraser Anning, the Senator for Queensland, had an egg slapped off his head today by a teenager, likely in response to the Australian politician’s comments made in the wake of the New Zealand mosque shooting in Christchurch. He reacted by then attacking the boy all whilst on […]

7 years ago

Juventus had it all to do in their Champions League last-16 second leg against Atletico Madrid. They needn’t have worried, they had the best player in the history of the competition on their side A feverish atmosphere took hold of Juventus stadium as the Bianconeri hosted the best defensive team in Europe, down two goals […]

7 years ago

Those bloody foreigners coming over here and managing our football teams and objectively doing a much better job than us mid to lower-table long ball cloggers Pint of wine consumer, unemployed man and all-round big individual Sam Allardyce has bemoaned the influence foreign managers are having on the Premier League. Weird, that. Him being a former […]

7 years ago

Paul Mitchell has received his sentence following the assault of Villa captain Jack Grealish Paul Mitchell has been sentenced to 14 weeks in jail after pleading guilty at Birmingham Magistrates’ Court to the assault of Jack Grealish during the second city derby on Sunday. At a magistrates’ court the maximum jail sentence Mitchell could have […]

7 years ago

Obviously Marcelo Bielsa had the most measured reaction to the Grealish incident Leeds United manager Marcelo Bielsa has linked Sunday’s assault of Aston Villa player Jack Grealish, which occurred during their 1-0 win in the second city derby against Birmingham City, to problems that extend beyond football. Speaking at Thorp Arch training ground ahead of […]

7 years ago

“I am not condoning guns at games but if the police are going to be armed, I think that is the way forward” Former Birmingham City midfielder David Cotterill has called for armed police at football matches following the assault of Jack Grealish during Sunday’s second city derby. Speaking to BBC Radio Wales, Cotterill said: […]

7 years ago

Paul Mitchell has pleaded guilty to assault Paul Mitchell, 27, has pleaded guilty to assault after invading the pitch and punching Jack Grealish during Sunday’s second city derby at St. Andrews. Further details of the incident were heard at Birmingham Magistrates’ Court on Monday morning, which included Mitchell claiming he was not intoxicated and that […]

7 years ago

The zoo has confirmed that nothing will be happening to the jaguar as a result A woman has been attacked by a jaguar after climbing over the safety barrier and attempting to take a selfie at an Arizona zoo. She did, however, return to the Wildlife World Zoo in Litchfield Park (around 20 miles from Phoenix) […]

7 years ago

41 people have been killed with knives this year Supermarket chain Asda are removing all single kitchen knives from their stores amidst concerns over the growing number of incidents of knife crime in Britain. Seven people were killed in London alone last week. According to Asda, single kitchen knives are the most frequently stolen from […]

7 years ago

Always be aware of the architectural layout of the stadium before you celebrate your goals, kids You may never have heard of Anthony Lopes before, the new star striker for J-League side Consadole Sapporo. Yes I did know that without Googling it. Fuck off, I did. Honest. Anyway, whilst celebrating his fourth of the evening […]

7 years ago

Sacre bleu Look. I don’t know what to say. You’ve probably already read about the Eric Cantona/Neymar Senior beef that occurred during Manchester United’s 3-1 win against PSG on Wednesday night. And now you’ve got this: An actual 52 year old man trolling Neymar, the ultra-modern designer footballer, someone who gets a haircut every few […]

7 years ago

Imagine not knowing what an onion bhaji is. Or how to play pool. Truly, a politician of the people “What… what is that?” It’s Theresa May, sat in your local curry house called Bengal Garden, waving a spindly, wrinkled finger at the plate of onion bhajis your waiter has just brought out. It’s an onion bhaji, […]

7 years ago

Is Neymar the solution to Real Madrid’s problems? Almost certainly not But that won’t stop money chucker extraordinaire Florentino Perez stumping up 300 million of the queen’s heads to pry him from PSG, the football club he spends his time playing for in between his sister’s birthday parties. Spanish website SPORT are reporting the news, […]

7 years ago

A fitting announcement for International Women’s Day Adidas have announced that the performance bonuses they will payout for the 2019 FIFA Women’s World Cup will be the same as the men’s tournament for the very first time. Not only did the news arrive on International Women’s Day, but it was also the same day players […]

7 years ago

BrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitmeansBrexitStrongandStable I don’t know if anyone is aware of this – I’m honestly not sure if anyone is – but Theresa May would really, really like for all the MPs to vote for her Brexit deal so she can bring down the final dull-bladed thud of the guillotine on Britain’s tired, weighty head and end […]

7 years ago

This week’s Gazprom wasn’t exactly short of drama. Then again, it never is There were some exceptional Champions League ties earlier in the week, from Ajax’s complete dismantling of Real Madrid at the Bernabeu, to the Ole Gunnar Solskjaer-spun wizardry that saw Manchester United vanquish PSG, to Porto’s extra time slugfest against Roma. Remarkably, the […]

7 years ago

Ole is at the wheel. Ole is the wheel. Fuck it, Ole is the entire car Fresh off bantering PSG Oil Barrens club de football out of the Champions League, Manchester United have now been given an additional lift in the form of three first team players returning to action in time for Sunday’s game […]

7 years ago

Just the boost the team needs going into Sunday’s game against a buoyant Manchester United Arsenal Arsenal Arsenal. Arsenal Arsenal Arsenal Arsenal Arsenal. What are we going to do with you? You just never make it easy on yourselves. It’s just never easy, is it? The wheels appeared to come off the Gunners’ mighty Europa […]

7 years ago

Trump’s ex-campaign manager has been jailed for far less than the recommended sentence Donald Trump’s former campaign manager Paul Manafort has been found guilty of fraud and sentenced to 47 months in jail. The political consultant was found guilty by a jury in August on eight counts of tax fraud, bank fraud and a foreign […]

7 years ago

James L. Brooks has confirmed the news The classic The Simpsons episode ‘Stark Raving Dad’ is being pulled from the show’s permanent rotation, according to its creators. The opening episode of season three, guest starring Michael Jackson, is being removed in the wake of HBO’s two-part documentary Leaving Neverland, which explores sexual abuse allegations made by two men […]

7 years ago

*Cristiano Ronaldo likes this* Things aren’t looking good for Gareth Bale in Spain after the Welshman was booed off the pitch by his own supporters following his substitution in Saturday’s El Clasico, which Real Madrid lost 1-0. The former Tottenham player has popped up relentlessly in the tabloids over the course of the last weeks […]

7 years ago

Cashback! This Time with Alan Partridge co-writers and directors Neil Gibbons and Rob Gibbons have let slip of another new Partridge series coming later this year during an interview on the Empire podcast. Filming is set to begin as early as May, with the man himself taking on a new challenge away from attempting to present This Time […]

7 years ago

The US congressional panel has requested documents from 81 government agencies, entities, and individuals including Donald Trump’s two sons Donald Trump is facing a new probe into his conduct after the US congressional panel announced that it has requested documents from 81 government agencies, entities and individuals. The announcement forms part of an investigation into […]

7 years ago

The Beverly Hills, 90210 star has died five days after suffering a stroke American actor Luke Perry has died following a stroke he suffered less than a week ago. His publicist said Perry died surrounded by his family and friends. Perry is best known for his role as Dylan McKay in Beverly Hills, 90210 and […]

7 years ago

Not the honourable behaviour you expect from the Turkish third tier Turkish football club Sakaryaspor have claimed that their players were attacked by a Amed SK player with a sharp object – believed to be a razor blade – during a game between the two local rivals on Saturday. According to reports, Amed SK midfielder […]

7 years ago

The identity of Jon Venables will not be made public The father of James Bulger has lost a court case to have the identity of Jon Venables made public. Bulger was murdered as a toddler in 1993 by Venables, who has lived in anonymity since his release from a life-sentence prison term in 2001. He […]

7 years ago

Is this some kind of sick joke? Hi. Hello. Hi. I don’t know if you know anything about me, I’m going to go ahead and assume you don’t, but recently I spent several weeks of my life ranking all 151 original Pokémon. It was, comfortably, the most difficult task I have ever undertaken and came with […]

7 years ago

I am absolutely 100% here for Chris Sutton dragging out his needless, one-sided beef with Brendan Rodgers In case you weren’t aware, former Celtic striker Chris Sutton is genuinely fuming that Brendan Rodgers has left the Scottish club to take over a Leicester City side with nothing to play for. He is livid. He is […]

7 years ago