A Cardiff cafe is serving a cooked breakfast in a jar and everything is not okay
The cooked breakfast is a sacred thing.
It's one of our proudest national pastimes. It must be loved. It must be protected. It must be treated with respect.
This means serving it in an appropriate manner: on a plate, with a knife and fork and a cup of tea. Nothing fancy required, no special utensils, and definitely no serving it in a ja-
WHAT IS THIS.
LOOK AT IT. IF YOU CAN BEAR IT, LOOK. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS.
To answer, this is a cooked breakfast in a jar, served by Munchies cafe in Cardiff. "Come try one of our breakfasts in a jar, the Instagram caption reads. "We're serving them until 5!"
And then never again, presumably.
There's so much wrong here. For a start, why on earth would scrabbling around in a jar be a good way to eat a cooked breakfast? The beans are going to make everything soggy - even a sausage breakwater would struggle here. You could drink this cooked breakfast, and you should never be able to drink a cooked breakfast.
The response online has been similarly incredulous.
This is everything that is wrong with the world
— FBB (@FreeButtonBee) August 7, 2017
How do you maintain the egg and bean separation? pic.twitter.com/LT9ICnSlvD
— (C)hris Armstrong 🎗 (@chris1ar) August 7, 2017
That actually makes me feel nauseous. That lovely crisp hash brown adulterated and soggy.
— jen725 (@jen725) August 7, 2017
That would get an unequivocal "I'm not fucking eating that!!"
— DogsBeAwesome (@Glasz_Half_Full) August 7, 2017
We can only hope that the cafe are having a laugh with us. Please tell us you're having a laugh with us. For the sake of the cooked breakfast, for the sake of the nation: please tell us you're having a laugh with us.