Ranking every World Cup nation from LEAST to MOST vibes

1st place is an obvious choice...

Sometimes it’s the kit, the fans, the players, the history or sometimes just a general inkling. Here is JOE’s ranking of every nation at the World Cup from LEAST to MOST vibes.. 

48. Tunisia

Dull kit, dull World Cup history and fate sealed after losing 5-1 to a side managed by an English bloke in a cowboy hat. Bottom.

47. Czechia

It’s not 2004 anymore and Czechia are only good at set pieces. 

46. Qatar

Conceding 27 shots only to equalise late on against Switzerland lifts Qatar off the bottom. 

45. Jordan

Once managed by Harry Redknapp. A good World Cup could boost Jordan's rank. 

44. Austria

Ralf Rangnick and Marco Arnautovic are Austria’s only redeemable features. 

43. Panama

Noisy but a bit naff, Panama are really just making up numbers.  

42. Saudi Arabia 

A World Cup regular. The 2-1 against Argentina in Qatar helps Saudi Arabia, but the loss of Herve Renard as coach is catastrophic. 

41. Switzerland 

Switzerland are the least vibey ‘big team’ despite Embolo and Rodriguez. Drawing against Qatar is also unforgivable.

40. Bosnia & Herzegovina

Beating Italy in qualifying and 40y/o Edin Dzeko is solid vibes but Bosnia are quite dull to watch. 

39. New Zealand

It's always great to watch the hapless Kiwi’s play every 4 years and their unbeaten 2010 campaign was delightful. 

38. Belgium

This is the last of the sweet summer vibes for Belgium. Could be near the bottom in 4 years. 

37. Paraguay

Sadly, Paraguay are the lowest ranked South American nation plus they got smashed 4-1 by the Yanks.

36. Sweden

Sweden are the least vibey country to reach a World Cup final. Helped out by the fans, the yellow kit and pumping Tunisia 5-1.

35. Canada 

Jesse Marsch and Alphonso Davies make Canada a curious vibes entity.

34. Cabo Verde 

A Shamrock Rovers defender called Pico and the fact they are an African island nation makes Cabo Verde solid vibes. 

33. USA

Tim Ream at CB is vibes, as is Folarin Balogun in attack. A generous 33rd for the USA. 

32. Portugal

Vitinha, Joao Neves & Nuno Mendes should make Portugal top 10 but Ronaldo and Roberto Martinez are a vibes cancer with no cure.

31. Iraq

The nickname ‘Lions of Mesopotamia’ plus being managed by a grumpy Aussie is doing a lot for Iraq.

30. Algeria

Algeria is another rising vibes nation. Riyad Mahrez and the memory of 2014 doing some heavy lifting.

29. Ecuador

Take out Pacho and Enner Valencia and the Ecuador vibes drop massively but still solid.

28. Australia

The most effective crap nation in football, Australia offers plenty of historic vibes too thanks to Cahill & Kewell.

27. England 

No Maguire is a massive vibes loss for England. It’s left to Bellingham, Pickford and a load of bucket hats to pick up the pieces.

26. Croatia

Croatian vibes will plummet once their OAP’s finally collapse. Still, great kit and always punch above their weight. 

25. South Africa

Bafana Bafana! Two reds in the opening match is class as is their association with the Vuvuzela, Jabulani and Tshabalala. 

24. Ghana 

The memory of 2010 and Asamoah Gyan carries Ghana into 24th. 

23. Iran 

Sticking the middle finger to the USA is superb vibes by Iran. 

22. Turkey

Turkey would be top 10 if they didn’t consistently fool people into thinking they are good.

21. Egypt

Propped up almost entirely by Mo Salah. Excellent fans and there is just something about the word Egypt which is very vibey.

20. Norway

An attack of Haaland, Sorloth, Nusa, Bobb and a bloke called Aasgaard is wonderful. Some delicious Norwegian kits this year too.

19. Uzbekistan 

The name alone puts debutants Uzbekistan in the top 20. First Central Asian nation at the World Cup is also a huge plus.

18. South Korea

The early signs suggest this could be another 2002 vibes bonanza for South Korea. The culture and Heung Min Son helps too.

17. Uruguay

2026 Uruguay are suffering from declining vibes and their home kit is poor. Still, Bielsa, Muslera and the memory of Forlan/ Cavani/ Suarez props up the plucky World Cup regulars.

16. France 

The Zidane headbutt, Michael Olise, national anthem and the big chicken earns France a top 20 spot.

15. Haiti

Despite being ravaged from within, Haiti qualified. Historic vibes from 1974 and some unreal names in their squad too (Johnny Placide!)

14. DR Congo

They flew to the USA in leopard print suits. Job done. 

13. Spain

Tika Taka is vibes forever. As are Lamine Yamal and Nico Williams. Not much beyond that.

12. Germany

Superb kits, Rudi Völlers mullet, Die Mannschaft name and the 7-1 over Brazil IN BRAZIL. Also proof that pragmatism can be vibey. 

11. Netherlands

Iconic history, fans and orange kit is doing a lot for a team managed by Ronald McDonald. The GOAT. 

10. Ivory Coast 

It’s hard to summarise but there is something seriously vibey about the dual named Côte d'Ivoire/ Ivory Coast once again. 

9. Scotland 

Somehow Europe’s vibiest nation. Unreal fans, anthem and McGinn/ McTominay combo. A pity about the football itself.

8. Morocco

Morocco only misses the top 5 because they won AFCON by default, which is pathetic.

7. Argentina

Maradona, the 2022 win for Messi and their general sh*thouse approach (Emi Martinez) makes Argentina very strong. But a lacklustre kit and repetitive squad holds them back this time.

6. Senegal 

The historic 2002 dub over France, the fans and their excellent team puts Senegal very high.

5. Curucao

No business being in the World Cup. But Caribbean island status, Tahith Chong, Dick Advocaat and the kit of the tournament makes Curucao top 5.

4. Japan

What’s not to love? Iconic kits, quality ballers and how the fans clean up the stadium has Japan in a deserved 3rd.

3. Colombia

RENE HIGUITA & JAMES RODRIGUEZ.

2. Mexico

We all wish they were hosting alone. Estadio Azteca is incredible, the Mexicans bloody love football, and you know they will give everything just to lose in the last 16. Viva El Tri.

1. Brazil 

The king of vibes despite starting with Igor Thiago up front. Bench him and their top spot will be secure forever more.