Warning: This post contains difficult descriptions of suicide
Lisa Marie Presley has admitted that her son's death "destroyed" her in a new essay for National Grief Awareness Day, saying that she was left in "unrelenting grips" of grief.
Speaking to PEOPLE magazine, the daughter of the late Elvis Presley said the death of her son Benjamin Keough in 2020 utterly destroyed her.
"You do not 'get over it,' you do not 'move on,' period," she wrote. "Despite people coming in the heat of the moment to be there for you right after the loss takes place, they soon disappear and go on with their own lives and they kind of expect for you to do the same, especially after some time has passed.
"This includes 'family' as well," she added.
Keough died in 2020 after a series of hardships that ultimately led to his suicide. He put a shotgun in his mouth, and neighbours reported how they heard "don't do it" before hearing the shot.
Presley continued: "You can feel stigmatized and perhaps judged in some way as to why the tragic loss took place.
"This becomes magnetized by a million if you are the parent of a child who passed. No matter how old they were. No matter the circumstances.
"I already battle with and beat myself up tirelessly and chronically, blaming myself every single day and that's hard enough to now live with, but others will judge and blame you too, even secretly or behind your back which is even more cruel and painful on top of everything else."
The 54-year-old mother continued to say that "NOTHING takes away the pain", but there are methods of support that "can help you feel a little bit less alone."
[caption id="attachment_356602" align="alignnone" width="2048"] Via Getty[/caption]
She also spoke about how she's always had to deal with grief, but her son's death felt "different."
She explained: "The sweetest and most incredible being that I have ever had the privilege of knowing, who made me feel so honored every single day to be his mother? Who was so much like his grandfather on so many levels that he actually scared me? Which made me worry about him even more than I naturally would have?
"No. Just no ... no no no no ...
"It's a real choice to keep going, one that I have to make every single day and one that is constantly challenging to say the least ... But I keep going for my girls."
Ultimately, Presley continues because that's what her son would've wanted. As she puts it: "taking care of his little sisters and looking out for them were on the forefront of his concerns and his mind.
"He absolutely adored them and they him. Me and my three daughters' lives as we knew it were completely detonated and destroyed by his death," she added. "We live in this every. Single. Day."
Sharing some concluding thoughts, she wrote: "And do me a favor, don't tell them that 'you can't imagine' their pain.
"The truth is, oh yes you can, you just don't want to."
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health head to thecalmzone.net for practical tips and advice. You can also talk to Samaritans 24/7 by calling 116 123 for free or visiting the Samaritans website. Alternatively, you can find more information and advice on the NHS website.
Via Getty[/caption]
She also spoke about how she's always had to deal with grief, but her son's death felt "different."
She explained: "The sweetest and most incredible being that I have ever had the privilege of knowing, who made me feel so honored every single day to be his mother? Who was so much like his grandfather on so many levels that he actually scared me? Which made me worry about him even more than I naturally would have?
"No. Just no ... no no no no ...
"It's a real choice to keep going, one that I have to make every single day and one that is constantly challenging to say the least ... But I keep going for my girls."
Ultimately, Presley continues because that's what her son would've wanted. As she puts it: "taking care of his little sisters and looking out for them were on the forefront of his concerns and his mind.
"He absolutely adored them and they him. Me and my three daughters' lives as we knew it were completely detonated and destroyed by his death," she added. "We live in this every. Single. Day."
Sharing some concluding thoughts, she wrote: "And do me a favor, don't tell them that 'you can't imagine' their pain.
"The truth is, oh yes you can, you just don't want to."
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health head to thecalmzone.net for practical tips and advice. You can also talk to Samaritans 24/7 by calling 116 123 for free or visiting the Samaritans website. Alternatively, you can find more information and advice on the NHS website.
