Week 2 – Cakes
GBBO continued to decimate our Tuesday evening plans last night with another gripping episode filled to the brim with cakey goodness.
The bakers undertook the hefty task of producing an abundance of flawless cakes for Prue and Paul, all done inside what was constantly referred to as The World’s Hottest Tent.
Tensions were running high, emotions were heightened, fridges were put through their paces, Noel Fielding was dressed as Marie Antoinette for some reason. It was chaos.
Here’s six key moments that might’ve slipped through your attention span, you big unobservant fool.
1. Manon doesn’t love the chickens
Sure, each week we’re gradually learning about how good they are at baking, but it’s also important to get a good sense of this year’s GBBO contestants outside of the kitchen. Their personalities are slowly becoming clear, we’re figuring out who’s a normal person and who simply does not love the chickens. Manon was caught in a candid moment on a farm last night, where she revealed that chickens are not her cup of thé (that is the French for tea, yes, I went to Université). What will we learn next? Does Rahul like pigeons? Is Luke a haemophiliac? Was Ruby in the debate society at school? Stay tuned to find out.
2. Jon really likes the colour blue
The man loves a floral shirt, that much we know to be true. But if you put him in a home environment, that’s when the real truth starts to become clear. His entire house, or all that we seem to be shown here, is blue and white. Jon has a very real quirk here, one that isn’t entirely surprising. Picture his lawn, dyed blue. The house is painted blue. Everything is blue, even the water. Financially, things are crippled due to the family’s inherent desire to have everything blue. The blue doorbell rings, it’s a guest. They have brought a bag of oranges. Jon slams the door and never emerges from the house again. Eiffel 65’s hit song plays in the distance.
3. Antony looked to his watch for guidance, BUT HE WASN’T EVEN WEARING ONE LOOOOL!!!!!11!!!1!!!1!!
Antony was checking how long he had left to complete the signature challenge, when he went to check his watch and – get this – REALISED HE WASN’T EVEN WEARING ONE!!! This is funny for two reasons, which I’ll break down: 1) Forgetting things is funny 2) Antony now has to figure out where he’s left his watch. Oh, how we laughed. GBBO is a force to be reckoned with. Not only do we get to witness borderline professional bakers producing exceptional cakes, now we’re being treated to comedic genius for the entirely reasonable price of free. We have fun, don’t we 🙂
4. God left us a long time ago and rightfully so, he is never coming back
Manon was preparing two tiny icing children for her showstopper cake when everything suddenly became clear. We are living on a soulless planet, one devoid of any overlord watching us all. God left us a long time ago and he’s never coming back. This tiny icing girl knows it, as evidenced by her pained expression. Her friend, who appears to have passed away, is also aware of this position in which we now find ourselves. What’s the point in doing anything? All we’re looking to shows like GBBO for is distractions to take our minds off the inevitability of death. Everything is temporary. Nothing matters. Cake though! Yum!
5. Rahul gave Manon a reassuring hug WHILE HIS HANDS WERE COVERED IN CHOCOLATE
In what is easily the most sinister move we’ve seen so far on this series of GBBO, Rahul attempted to comfort an exasperated Manon right before we went to an ad break. He walked around from his workstation over to hers, then instigated a reassuring hug. Seems like a wholesome act, one spurred on by compassion and concern for her wellbeing, doesn’t it? Well, look closely at Rahul’s hands. They’ve covered in chocolate. He’s sabotaging Manon’s hair and blouse because he is determined to make a fool out of her. This is a sick tactic and one we need to monitor closely throughout the series. It inevitably begs the question, would this happen if GBBO was still being shown on BBC? No, because they didn’t have any godforsaken ad breaks.
6. Prue’s necklace doubled up as a waiting room children’s toy
Last week, we saw Prue proudly displaying all of the Crash Bandicoot relics she had collected around her neck, so it was only right that this week she kept the momentum going. This time, Prue’s necklace doubled up as a waiting room children’s toy, with an abundance of intricacies and twists for kids to navigate their way around for hours on end. The woman might be an accomplished baker and judger of other peoples’ bakes, but that doesn’t mean she’s forgotten about the bakers of tomorrow. With her willingness to appeal to all manner of people, Prue is slowly but surely changing the world. The future is in very safe hands.
Images via Channel 4
