Dalai Lama slammed for ‘not being Glastonbury enough’

The Dalai Lama faced a huge backlash following his Glastonbury performance on Sunday afternoon.

The famous monk was joined on the Pyramid Stage by Patti Smith, but she could do little to assuage angry criticism that he was 'too modern' and 'not the Rolling Stones'. Blossom Tori, who is taking a gap year from being a trust fund baby, was just one reveller to voice her frustration. "I ordered my tickets hoping to catch some traditional English spirituality, like the Druids or Sting. What's this Dalai bloke got to do with Glastonbury? I'm pretty sure they've got their own festivals in Wales," argued Tori. Geoff Irate from Luton was another member of the throng who was less than impressed with the Tibetan artist. "Who does he think he is? Going round calling himself 'His Holiness'? It's a f*cking liberty," said Irate. "As for being a monk, he ain't a real monk. Not like Friar Tuck. Why can't we have Friar Tuck?" The 79-year-old (in this life) buddhist led a prayer for world peace, which many found 'pretentious' and 'trying too hard to be the Pope'. He signed off with a quote from the Sermon on the Mount, which ex-Westlife member Brian McFadden tweeted was 'sh*t compared to the original'.