Giedrius Arlauskis – Goalkeeper. A safe pair of hands, with which to collect his monthly benefits.
Georgas Freidgeimas – Defender. Probably wants a woman on Top Gear. #BringBackJezza
Egidijus Vaitkūnas – Defender. Thinks climate change is actually a thing.
Tadas Kijanskas – Defender. Doesn’t want ID cards, which begs the question: What has he got to hide?
Vytautas Andriuškevičius – Defender. Left-back…at the immigration pen if I had my way.
Karolis Chvedukas – Midfielder. Wants to convert YOUR local into a mosque.
Gediminas Vičius – Left-wing. Commie pinko bastard.
Artūras Žulpa – Right-wing. Not bad actually. We could work with this one.
Mindaugas Panka – Defensive midfielder. Likes to get forward. Why can’t he just stay in his own half?
Deivydas Matulevičius – Striker. Sounds like a trade unionist. Get back to work!
Fiodor Černych – Striker. Sounds Welsh, probably one of that Plaid Cymru lot.
Igoris Pankratjevas – Manager. No doubt a bureaucrat. Mind the red tape.
