Week 10 – The Final.
We’ve made it. Ten weeks of this bullshit has finally come to a close with Sophie being crowned the eventual winner of GBBO 2017.
It was a delightful series, complete with bakes and yep, that’s pretty much it. They just baked a load of things. That’s the whole premise of the show.
As with every episode, it’s likely that a few key moments may have gone over your head with all the excitement.
Not to worry, I’ve highlighted them below. So, for the last time in 2017, here are six important things you might’ve missed on last night’s GBBO.
1. Kate’s Dad is Benjamin Button
Given that it was the final episode of this year’s GBBO, we got to hear some kind words from the final three contestants’ friends and families. During the course of Kate’s montage, it became clear that her Dad is indeed Benjamin Button. Kate is 29 years old, meaning that her Dad must be a bit older than that. As the above image demonstrates, those facts simply don’t add up. This man is blatantly in his early to mid-thirties, at a push. There is but one explanation. Mr. Kate’s Dad is Benjamin Button. He is ageing backwards and although this has nothing to do with GBBO, it deserves highlighting in the media because it’s important.
2. Sophie’s boyfriend definitely lied about being Irish
As a legitimate Irish person, I can confirm that Sophie’s boyfriend’s alleged Irish accent was like nothing I’ve ever heard before. Subtitles wouldn’t have gone amiss when he was on screen because truly it was a confusing time for all involved. Perhaps he is from the deep countryside in a place that nobody has heard of, but if we’re being honest with ourselves, David is lying. He’s a Brit. That accent was made up on the spot to distract us from the fact that GBBO is steeped in controversy this year. A contestant with a Dad who is Benjamin Button? A contestant with a boyfriend who is fake Irish? Pull the plug, Channel 4. You’re done.
3. Sophie can’t do yoga for shit
She was hunkered down beside the oven keeping an eye on her rising bread when a notion overcame Sophie to try out some yoga poses. With credit to her, it’s the GBBO final, nobody is thinking straight. Sophie balanced herself solely by her arms for approximately one-third of a second, then quickly came tumbling down. Is this the kind of person we want to see crowned as GBBO‘s 2017 winner? Absolutely. People that can do yoga properly are not to be trusted. It’s witchcraft. There is no logical reason as to why you should be able to put your feet behind your head. Sophie raised a very valid point about the occult with this display.
4. This sample entremet cake was more beautiful inside and out than any of us ever will be
The shine, those definite layers, the decorative finish. It’s perfection and it’s a standard of beauty that neither you nor I will ever be able to achieve. It was shown as an example of perfection as the bakers commenced their final showstoppers and truly, it stole the show. Personally, I let out an audible gasp when this cake appeared on screen. There’s a very specific type of porn online where you can look at beautifully crafted cakes such as this one, I’m sure of it. Although us mortals may never achieve that level of prettiness, at least we can eat it at some stage when we’re in France probably if they still make them anywhere. Who cares, just LOOK AT IT.
5. Steven gave his cake a quick spray tan, raising an important question about vanity
Surely the final of GBBO is not the time to worry about whether your baked goods appear to be sun-kissed or not? You’d think so, but in the case of Steven Carter-Bailey, it was precisely the time for him to fire up his industrial fake tan applicator to give his cake that sought-after sheen. While Kate and Sophie were fiddling with the finishing touches of their entremet cakes, Steven was busy manually tanning a piece of cake. Listen, it’s 2017. Beauty standards are constantly changing and if you don’t keep up, you’re going to get left behind. Credit where it’s due, that cake looked like it had just come back from a weekend in Torremolinos.
6. They absolutely rinsed Prue in the updates at the end
This was a lot to take in, but it definitely happened. As is commonplace with the final episode of GBBO each year, viewers are provided with a quick update about what’s been happening with each baker since filming. For example, Tom is training for the London marathon and Julia, Flo and Yan all met up in Liverpool for a catch-up and a spot of car karaoke. Also, Prue ruined the GBBO final for everyone by accidentally tweeting her congratulations to Sophie yesterday morning. We’re assured that it was completely unintentional, but mistake or not, it had to be included in these final updates. Prue would also like to let everyone know that Snape kills Dumbledore. Spoiler alert.
Images via Channel 4
