REVEALED: The best jokes from Peter Kay’s upcoming tour of the UK

He's back...

Britain’s Remember-in-Chief Peter Kay has announced his first tour in eight years, including stops in Birmingham, Manchester, London and Glasgow. The Bolton-born comic told the BBC that he would have a lot to talk about in his new show, including “Twitter and Trump.” We take a look ahead to some of the best lines from that new material.

“Remember white dog poo? You probably can’t say white nowadays can you? For fear of offending someone.” “Dad’s a good, aren’t they? Remember when they’d say things like, ‘we should take back control, son’ and ‘let’s stop kowtowing to the EUSSR’?” “Remember when football jerseys were baggy? Little Michael Owen dashing past the Argentine defence like a flying bat.” “Remember Ukip? They were an electoral force for a while, weren’t they? All purple rosettes and mustard tweed and dog-whistle racism.” “Remember dial-modems? [impersonates a dial-up modem]” “Remember when Whitney passed away? RIP u will live on forever. Cant believe it. I wanna run to u. Really cant believe this. @” “Remember the strong pound? Remember going on holiday and getting a half-decent exchange rate?” “Remember centrism?” “Remember when the price of Freddoes rose in line with inflation?” “Remember frothy listicles aiming to do numbers via social media sharing?” “Remember when there was a glass ceiling for white supremacists in the US?” “Remember when everything hadn’t gone to shit?”

Since his last tour, the Lancastrian jokesmith has been most visible as the writer and star of Peter Kay's Car Share on the BBC. Tickets for Kay's tour go on sale on November 19.