Noel Gallagher reckons pornography on his phone will cost him a knighthood
Noel Gallagher's hopes of one day receiving a knighthood might just have taken a sizeable dent this week.
After attending Wednesday night's BRIT awards, the ex-Oasis guitarist lost his phone in a taxi and, according to the Daily Star, had reason to believe its contents could scupper his chances of one day becoming 'Sir Noel'.
Reportedly speaking at an after-party, Gallagher revealed that the pornography on his phone would shatter his squeaky clean image - simultaneously ruining any knighthood chances.
"I’ve lost my fucking phone," he reportedly said. "I have tried calling it and it’s actually gone. I have no idea where it is!
“I better find it because of all the fucking porn on it, don’t want that to get out and splashed everywhere. I can’t have that out, it will ruin my image of being an innocent, wholesome pop star.
“I can kiss goodbye to my knighthood, that won’t happen after someone picks up my phone.”
Noel was on hand at the BRITs to present the award for Best British Male Solo Artist. The award was won by the late David Bowie and was accepted on behalf of his son, Duncan Jones.
As you might have expected, Noel's little brother didn't have that much in the way of kind things to say about his brother's appearance, especially when he got wind of a picture of him with Simon Cowell.
NUFF SAID LG x pic.twitter.com/63lzP4yy45
— Liam Gallagher (@liamgallagher) February 24, 2017
Some things never change.