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Entertainment

21st Apr 2018

Here are the 13 best movies on the TV this weekend

Rory Cashin

Whenever you get too sunburned to stay outside, we’ve got all the recommendations you need.

We know that since the sun has decided to make its very first public appearance in what feels like three years, the last thing on your mind is spending any time indoors.

But if you’re staying home, (shout out to those with hayfever, or who just burn very, very easily),these are the best 15 movies you’ll find this weekend:

SATURDAY

 

Super 8 – Film 4 – 18:45

JJ Abrams does his best Spielberg impression by having a group of movie-loving kids fighting for their lives in Smalltown USA, as a mysterious monster prowls the night-time streets. A bit of a precursor to the eventual popularity of the nostalgia comeback like Stranger Things and IT.

Beetlejuice – Syfy – 19:00

“Ah, well, I attended Julliard, I am a graduate of the Harvard Business School, I travel quite extensively, I lived through the Black Plague and I had a pretty good time during that, I’ve seen The Exorcist about 167 TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT!”

Predestination – Film 4 – 21:00

Ethan Hawke stars in this absolutely mind-bending time-travel thriller in which he plays an agent sent to stop a terrorist who will launch an attack that will kill thousands of people.

Sinister – Film 4 – 22:50

Ethan Hawke again, but this time he plays a struggling author, who discovers a snuff movie and moves his family into the home of the victims on the murder tape. Things do not go well.

Crank: High Voltage – ITV2 – 23:25

The absolutely bonkers sequel to the original movie that we reckoned couldn’t be out-bonker’ed. But we should’ve known right from the get go, considering how Jason Statham returns to the movie.

The Recruit – BBC One – 23:50

Colin Farrell is singled-out by Al Pacino during the recruitment process for the FBI, to help find a mole within the FBI itself, who may actually be another new recruit alongside Farrell.

SUNDAY

Congo – Film 4 – 16:45

A group of scientists head deep into the jungle to seek out a lost city, which may also be home to a lost treasure, as well as a previously-thought-extinct breed of gorilla that will kill anyone who approaches.

Snow White & The Huntsman – E4 – 18:30

Kirsten Stewart is Snow White, Charlize Theron is the Evil Queen, and Chris Hemsworth is The Huntsman, in this gritty retelling of the classic fairytale.

Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes – Film 4 – 18:55

The movie that kicked off the epic ape trilogy, this time with James Franco and Frieda Pinto as young scientists attempting to increase an ape’s intelligence, but they may have also created something much worse…

Equilibrium – Syfy – 20:00

Christian Bale doing something called “Gun-Kata”. If you can imagine a kind of sci-fi version of John Wick, you’re pretty much there.

The Other Guys – Comedy Central – 21:00

Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg try to become the new precinct hot shots, but may have winded up in something far more complicated than they’re capable of dealing with. Very, very funny comedy.

Assassins – ITV4 – 21:00

Sly Stallone plays the assassin who wants to retire, but Antonio Banderas is the hot, new assassin who has been hired to “retire” him, in a more permanent way. So they two best assassins in the world are forced to go head to head.

Easy A – Channel 4 – 23:10

Emma Stone stars in this teen-com take on The Scarlet Letter than is every bit as funny, smart and memorable as Mean Girls. The perfect way to end your weekend.