Bye Bye Bezos
Jeff Bezos, his brother, and the highest bidder are set to journey into the depths of space in his personal spaceship, the New Shepherd. However, a petition has surfaced that aims to ban Bezos from re-entering the planet's atmosphere.
The New Shepherd will take three minutes to journey to the precipice of space, where it will experience weightlessness for another three minutes. Afterwards, the ship will fall back to earth. The final seat on the ship has sold for $28 million.
https://twitter.com/TheRogue_Taco/status/1404231623592321026
The petition reads as follows:
"Jeff Bezos is actually Lex Luthor, disguised as the supposed owner of a super successful online retail store. However, he's actually an evil overlord hellbent on global domination. We've known this for years. Jeff has worked with the Epsteins and the Knights Templar, as well as the Free Masons to gain control over the whole world. He's also in bed with the flat Earth deniers; it's the only way they'll allow him to leave the atmosphere. Meanwhile, our government stands by and lets it happen.
This may be our last chance before they enable the 5G microchips and perform a mass takeover."
Though the employment of satirical language could hint that the petition is for comedic purposes, this could alternatively be the work of a true conspiracy theorist. Regardless of the authors intent, the petition now has 6,842 signatures.
But this isn't the only petition circling Bezos. Another has sprung up that calls for the billionaire to buy and later eat the Mona Lisa.
https://twitter.com/myunclesmemes/status/1404350977055023105
The New Shephard is set to lift off on the 20th of July. Sign the petition if you want Bezos remain in space.
