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23rd Mar 2015

USA Soccer Guy: Stevie Gee costs Liver Pool real bad

Soccer Guy

Stevie Gee messed up real bad as his Liver Pool franchise lost to Man Unity, missing out on the chance to make the EPL League’s awesome foursome.

Having not even touched the soccer ball for the first forty-five minutes, Gee got the major felony card for stamping on some guy just a minute into the second quarter.

It was a pretty dumbass thing to do, and Gee’s timing was real bad too. Go ask any of the guys that live there – with the cities of Manchester and Liver Pool being so close, they’re pretty much the same place, which means that this soccer game is one of the most eagerly anticipized in the whole of England.

The Unity were already winning when the two red-uniformed franchises headed for the locker rooms at half time out. Like a bear ripping up the body of some hiker who got lost in the woods, an awesome pass kick tore up the deefense of Liverpool, allowing real small Juan Matter to insert from a cute angle.

Later on, after Gee had gone to go look at mansions in Beverley Hills in the locker room, the hobbit like Spanish guy made it two. A wedge pass was kicked into the danger box zone and Matter cycled it real hard into the SGI.

Liverpool v Manchester United - Premier League

But just when the home franchise looked like they were gonna get their asses handed to them, a pass kick made room for Stowage to get a goalshot back for the numerically challenged Liver Ducks.

But it was too late. Chasing the equalization, Liver Pool gave away a deathstrike in overtime when Daily Blind, the guy that sounds like a Braille newspaper, got taken down in the danger box zone. Dwayne Rooney stepped up but his real hard kick was punched away by the hand of Midge Ole – a real finger blaster for the Liver Pool goaltender.

The completion whistle was blown but as the Unity clapped each other high fives and soaked their coach in Gatorade, the Liver Pool fans were making their feelings known about Stevie Gee.

Since taking the decision to make the step up to MLS, there’s been a real feeling that he has been saving himself for when he arrives at LAX. Many Liver Pool fans have turned on him and soccer chants of ‘Stevie Gee is a humongous douchebag’ were clearly heard at the end of the game. Outside, hundreds of his jerseys were burned.

Sure, it may have ended pretty bad for him and his guys, but Stevie Gee will know that he can make the move to LA knowing that he did at least leave his stamp on this soccer match.