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18th Apr 2015

Soccer Guy’s EPL League Round Up

Soccer Guy

History is made after one of the most historical wins in the history of Chelsea Franchise Club’s history…

Coach Juan Mourinho’s guys won at soccer today, to take a humongous step towards getting their fingers inside some EPL World Championship victory rings.

The only goalshot against Man Unity was also the only goalshot of the entire game, and was also enough to win the points. After Terry John kicked Radical Falcao in the ass, the Blues played the pass kick into the danger box zone for Micky Hazard to put it into the Unity ball bag.

The Unity did pretty good though, and the home franchise had to survive what one famous old Scotch soccer coach once called ‘squeaky fanny time’ to make sure they got the victory points.


Fair result for Albinos

Wes Brownich Albinos made it a road trip to remember for their soccer fans as they beat off the Crystal Palace Eagles down at the Selhurst Soccer Palace.

The Albinos inserted two goalshots and kept a shutout against the franchise with a name like they came straight outta Breaking Bad.

West Bromwich Albion v Everton

Victory is real sweet for the Soccer Candies

Evertown made the win against the Burnlee, beating the Lancashire Heat by the one goalshot.

The Soccer Candies ain’t had the greatest of seasons this time out, but will hope that victories like this one will help Coach Ricky Martinez hang on to MVP Tim Howard.

Gala Awards 2002 : News Photo

Seaswans can’t handle the truth as Liechester take another win

One potato chip loving soccer show anchor will be smiling tonight, as Liechester City won at soccer once again. Totally lame for most of this season, even their own soccer fans were laughing at them a few weeks back.

But after today’s win against the Seaswans, Liechester have an awesome shot at making it outta the jaws of the disaster sector and into EPL 2016.


Stoked City punish holey Saints deefense

Real good for most of this year, the EPL league’s most Christian franchise, the South Coast Saints, better go to church tomorrow and ask for forgiveness for such dumbass deefense.

Wesley Sneijderlin parted the red and white sea to open up the scores for the Saints, but just like Jesus himself, Stoked City came back from the dead. Marma Duke made an equalization before Adam sent the Saints to burn in the fires of soccer hell with his late goalshot.

New England Revolution v Seattle Sounders