Let’s make this perfectly clear from the off: there is nothing remotely funny about breaking someone’s nose and a couple of their teeth.
That’s why Republic of Ireland international Anthony Stokes has just been ordered to stump up €230,000 after doing precisely that by headbutting an Elvis impersonator in a Dublin nightclub in 2013.
The former Celtic striker – now with Blackburn Rovers – had already agreed to pay the man €30,000 but faces forking out a much more significant sum after being sued by the man at Dublin’s High Court.
Stokes was also given a two-year suspended sentence for the incident, which he admitted to earlier in the month.
Although we should again point out that this isn’t a laughing matter, the response of Simon Jordan, a man who was chairman at Crystal Palace during Stokes’ loan spell there eight years ago, does appear to have amused plenty.
It came after Sky’s Kaveh Solhekol had tweeted news of Stokes fine on Thursday morning.
Blackburn striker Anthony Stokes ordered by Irish court to pay an Elvis impersonator €230,000 for headbutting him in a nightclub
— Kaveh Solhekol (@SkyKaveh) February 16, 2017
Having seen this, Jordan quoted Solhekol’s tweet, remarking that the fee Stokes would have to pay to the impersonator matched the one he handed to the striker in wages for ‘impersonating a footballer’.
That's roughly what I paid Anthony stokes as #cpfc for impersonating a footballer https://t.co/JI2aCXY98E
— Simon Jordan (@Sjopinion10) February 16, 2017
Ouch.
Almost instantly, the tweet began to clock up plenty of retweets and plenty of replies – few of which were sympathetic towards Stokes.