We're long past the point where a news story from 2016 can be deemed 'too weird'.
This, of course, is the year a Major League Soccer club set up
a Rick Astley tifo. It's the year
Jürgen Klopp mastered time travel. It's the year West Ham got a guy along to their kit launch
to rap about suits. Yeah, we know.
So we'd forgive you for looking at the words 'Premier League player flees police on medical buggy' and just shrug. After all, nothing should surprise us this year, right?
But we know you. You like weird. You like 'wtf' stories. You pretend you don't care about Enner Valencia, but you're lying.
Where are we going with this? Read on...
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Valencia, the West Ham man currently on loan at Everton, is reportedly embroiled in a child support row where he is alleged to owe more than £13,000 to the mother of his daughter.
Things have seemingly got so serious that police made it out to Ecuador's national stadium when the 26-year-old was representing his country against Chile in a World Cup qualifier.
And when Valencia left the pitch with altitude sickness in the second half, they decided to make their move. They confronted the player - who made his escape on a medical buggy. It would be comedically funny if the subject wasn't so serious.
https://twitter.com/federicocasotti/status/784312952715300864
Ecuador ended up winning the game by three goals to nil, with Manchester United's Antonio Valencia joined on the scoresheet by Cristian Ramirez and Felipe Caicedo.
Gustavo Quinteros' team moved back into the automatic World Cup qualifying places with their victory, as Argentina dropped points in Peru.
