Shameful, embarrassing, diabolical, shambolic.
Just four words that resonated last week as Newcastle United slumped to a 1-0 defeat at the hands of Sheffield Wednesday in the Capital One Cup.
If the result against Championship opposition wasn’t bad enough, the performance was terrible. The Newcastle Chronicle pulled no punches:
‘Some of these players don’t look up to standard and the ones that do just don’t look interested when it matters.’
It was hardly an anomaly for the season so far – more a pathetic nadir. The Magpies have looked listless and inept for most of August and September.
Then came Saturday evening, and a performance against Chelsea which was the complete antithesis of what had come before. The Barcodes were superb.
The visitors found it difficult to cope with Newcastle’s jest and commitment. In fact, it could be argued that the obscene effort they put in for most of the game was their ultimate undoing.
In the end, Chelsea did well to escape with a point, but it was only after the home side visibly tired in the latter third of the game.
It all begs the question: How and why can one team look so rank awful mid-week, and then transform into a thrilling and dangerous outfit less than three later?
In Newcastle’s case, you have to wonder whether they are that most fraudulent of modern footballing phenomenons – Game-Upping Bastards, or GUBs.
The Champions of England came to toon, bringing with them Sky Sport’s cameras and the world’s press, and the Geordies were magnificent – going toe-to-toe with the likes of Hazard, Matic and Fabregas.
But against Sheffield Wednesday? Or Watford? Or West Ham? Or Swansea? They were largely p*ss poor.
Of course they battled manfully against Arsenal, and left Old Trafford with a very well-deserved point. Notice a pattern? We’ll let Jose Mourinho spell it out:
“I think maybe one of the reasons why Newcastle over the years doesn’t get good positions is because of this mentality, it’s because they choose some matches to sweat blood and in other matches, they don’t.”
Saturday’s result was manna from heaven for a beleaguered Steve McClaren, whose livelihood is still very much at risk. But really, is he solely to blame for the bipolar performances of his side?
Of course motivation is key, and McClaren is ultimately responsible for that. But his players need to pull their collective fingers out and perform against each and every foe with the fight and desire.
Newcastle is a one-club city and their barmy fans are a captive audience. But they’ll only stand for these double-standards for so long.
The playing staff need to show their mettle and build on the Chelsea result – not only at the Etihad next Saturday – but against Norwich City too.
