Finally, something to unite the nation
This Friday, the government has a plan. A plan, an idea to heal the fractured nation that we live in, to help bring us together after a difficult 15 months.
They're going to get children in schools across the land to sing about how great and wonderful and strong and powerful the United Kingdom is.
And it's real. This isn't a joke. It's not a chapter from 1984. There's no Hunger Games taking place afterwards. This is a real, genuine idea that our government have come up with.
The Department for Education is
encouraging children to sing a song called "Strong Britain" as part of celebrations for "One Britain One Nation" day.
The Department for Education is promoting the day as a chance for children to learn about "shared values of tolerance, kindness, pride and respect."
https://twitter.com/educationgovuk/status/1406990765906145281?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1406990765906145281%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
First, listen to the song.
https://youtu.be/-KAWylrnlvA
Haunting. Chilling. Creepy. All hail Kim Johnson-Un.
You probably won't be surprised to hear that this has been ridiculed. And in a weird way, it's served its purpose. The nation has been united in its horror at this little tune.
Many made the obvious comparisons with North Korea.
https://twitter.com/cotswold31415/status/1407431222742167566
https://twitter.com/MrPeterJThomas/status/1407436425507872775?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1407436425507872775%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
https://twitter.com/DPJHodges/status/1407412140454166528?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1407412140454166528%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
Others were keen to point out that schools in Scotland will actually be on holiday on this day, with the government seeming to forget that Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland have devolved education systems.
https://twitter.com/PippaCrerar/status/1407401219711070210?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1407401219711070210%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
https://twitter.com/johnharris1969/status/1407586023052357635?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1407586023052357635%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
But from Brexiteers to Remainers, lockdown sceptics to Corbynistas, it seems that finally we are united. United in a stomach-churning displeasure at this horrific little ditty.
https://twitter.com/JuliaHB1/status/1407407647092056073?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1407407647092056073%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
https://twitter.com/JimMFelton/status/1407406903550959620?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1407406903550959620%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
If you want to learn the words to this song - the tune that will be soundtracking our final march into an Orwellian Black Mirror x The Thick of It crossover episode - then here they are.
https://twitter.com/khurramfarooq/status/1407402551662764045?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1407402551662764045%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fd-13071342881981009676.ampproject.net%2F2106120107000%2Fframe.html
Print them off, force your children to learn them, then bow down to our mighty leader, Boris Johnson, as you sing: "We are Britain. And we have one dream."
When will this nightmare end?
