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26th Apr 2017

Complimentary enemas and fake ‘fake news’ – my brush with definitely-not-racist Tommy Robinson

Stop saying he's racist.


My hero. My mate.

Former EDL leader and current Renaissance man Tommy Robinson is not racist. I can say this categorically, because I have been informed by a number of his Twitter followers.

What did I do to draw this information? I had the audacity to make a silly joke at his expense. For those of you unaware, Robinson currently has a bestselling* book out, entitled ‘The Enemy of the State’. The front cover features a brooding Robinson standing defiantly in front of the Houses of Parliament, as if to stick two fingers up at the liberal elite.

I had noticed that in order to promote his book, he would retweet anyone mentioning the fact they’d bought or read his book. I thought I would do the same, with a couple of slight changes. He’d see the funny side, right? He’d obviously bigger things to worry about, like Sharia Law or whatever.

Of course, within minutes I had the hallowed Tommy Robinson follow-favourite combination.

This in turn drew the attention of The Independent, who wrote about it under the headline ‘Tommy Robinson got brilliantly trolled by a ‘fan’ of his book’.

Robinson was having none of it, and in a tweet called it ‘Fake news’.

I did ask him which parts of the article were specifically false, given that everything I’ve written so far actually happened, but he didn’t reply.

As it turns out, his fans were quick to point out that to be called an ‘enema of the state’ is actually a compliment, so he needn’t have worried.

The non-racist Tommy Robinson is clearly lucky to have a devoted following.

The story would be rounded off nicely if Robinson were to call this article ‘fake news’, so allow me to end with some actual FAKE NEWS:

Tommy Robinson does not have a criminal record for assaulting an off-duty police officer.