Barbra Streisand has cloned her dead dog into two new dogs

One of her dogs, the uncloned one, is called Miss Fanny.

Barbra Streisand was chatting to Variety when she revealed a bunch of things, but most importantly she told them that she has cloned her dead dog TWICE. Two of her Coton de Tulear dogs (Miss Violet and Miss Scarlett) were cloned from cells taken from the mouth and stomach of her 14-year-old dog Samantha, who died last year. The third dog, Miss Fanny, is said to be a distant cousin of the others.

"They have different personalities... I'm waiting for them to get older so I can see if they have her brown eyes and her seriousness".

There's a lot to unpack here, so let's start with the fact that Barbra named one of her dogs (the uncloned one) Miss Fanny. In the US, 'fanny' means buttocks, but once you head eastward across the globe, that dog is literally called Miss Vagina. Does Barbra know this and if so, mad respect for carrying on regardless. Next, we need to chat a bit about the cloning process. I was unaware that it was a service open to dog owners. Personally, I've never had a dog, but could I get one made from my dead Granny's DNA? That would be a pretty sweet mix because a dog that loves cake and watching A Touch Of Frost would be the perfect companion tbqh. Also it's worth touching on Barbra's excitement at seeing if the dogs have brown eyes or Samantha's seriousness. She can figure out the brown eyes thing pretty quickly, but her seriousness? What does a serious dog look like? Does it wear a top hat and read the Financial Times for fun? Does it use a monocle as a legitimate means of vision improvement? Does it understand how Sudokus work? There's only one explanation for all of the above. Barbra has lost it. She's 75 years old and she has descended into madness. You cannot call a dog Miss Fanny. It's barbaric and I simply won't allow it. The cloning is fine, but don't embarrass a dog by calling it Miss Vagina.    

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Images via Variety