Lobster bench presses cucumber: a critical analysis 4 months ago

Lobster bench presses cucumber: a critical analysis

One weightlifting lobster is currently gaining rave reviews for his bench press prowess

But on closer inspection, this real-life Larry the Lobster actually has a lot of work to do. He's not the finished lobster. Let's take a look at his form and technique in greater detail.

Bikini Bottom lifeguard Larry may have been a bench press bro, but he too was guilty of some common fitness faux pas.

Ego lifting is a big problem in most gyms, but now it seems to have made its way into the marine crustacean world too. A truly sad state of affairs. Is it an epidemic? Too early to tell.

Hand/Pincer Placement

Most strength coaches advocate a shoulder-width grip when bench pressing. What's that, you've got no shoulders due to your biological nature being that of a soft-shell decapod? That's no excuse.


In the words of the Hodge Twins, you're gonna snap your s**t up son. You've taken a grip far too wide. You've got yourself a one-way ticket to Snap City.

Get in the sea.

Foot Placement

Writing in the Encyclopedia of Muscle & Strength, exercise scientist Dr. Jim Stoppani says "lie face up on a bench with both your feet flat on the floor".

This chap has eight of them. And they're flailing everywhere.

Putting up your best possible bench press is all about generating force. From the floor up. You need your feet placed firmly on the ground for this, even if the composition of your body makes it physically impossible to do so.

Back Stability

While you might be an invertebrate with a tough outer exoskeleton instead of a back, leading exercise scientist Dr. Brad Schoenfeld writes that "your back should remain on the bench throughout the move and remain stable at all times".

'Oh, I don't have a back,' you might mutter in lobster language, but this sort of form will leave you with serious tough outer exoskeleton problems later in your life.

Tempo

You're meant to slowly lower the bar towards your chest, but lobster man clearly didn't get the memo.

Dropping the bar with such a lack of control is a recipe for turning yourself into a stir fry before any respectable chef can.

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