Unlike Cersei and Jamie, we’ve never hid our love for all things Game of Thrones.
Like many of you, we’re getting restless while waiting on season six of the HBO smash-hit to air but our Ramsay Boltonesque rage has been quenched by the incredible teaser trailer.
There was so much going though that it’s hard to decipher everything in one viewing.
That’s why we’ve put our finest Maester on the job to decipher the clues. Here’s our best insights, opinions and theories.
Obviously, there are spoilers ahead. So turn away now if you’re afraid of finding out too much.
Jon Snow’s body is still cold.
Yep, nobody has even moved the body of the 998th Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch. How rude.
Lannisters always pay their debts.
We’d be willing to put money on our theory that this ship is travelling from Dorne to King’s Landing, containing the body of Myrcella Baratheon. To put it bluntly, s**t is going to hit the fan when Cersei finds out what happened to her only daughter.
An honourable man on his own in The North.
Ser Davos is one of the most decent and genuine characters in the show. But we all know what that happens to nice characters, don’t we? We’ve a feeling that he’s paying his respects to the Princess Shireen here.
If looks could kill
Ramsay Bolton has lost his wife and could lose his claim to be the next Warden of the North with the arrival of a new baby.
Did someone say patricide?
We still know nothing
Melisandre has lost faith in the Lord of Light but what does she see now when she looks into the fire? Ser Davos clearly cared for Princess Shireen so why isn’t he slitting the Red Priestesses throat at the very first opportune moment?
Maybe he needs her for something that’s even bigger than revenge. Any guesses what that could be?
Dragons > Horses
Daenerys is walking to the Dothraki stronghold of Vaes Dothrak. It’s clear that the Khaleesi isn’t being held in high regard as seen by the fact that she isn’t on horseback. She needs the help of her dragons Drogon, Viserion or Rhaegal – and quick.
Always choose violence
It seems that Cersei is finally read to let her freak off the leash.
We’re going to call him Frankenmountain and the Faith Militant are in deep trouble.
Keep your head but…
That looks an awful lot like Ned Stark on the left. But he looks a good deal younger than when we saw him last.
There have been rumours of flashbacks in the new season already. Is this the much expected scene at the Tower of Joy?
We do not sow
Meet Euron Greyjot. He’s ruthless, cold blooded and a brilliant tactician.
The Iron Throne has a new contender.
Fire and Blood
Notice the sigil on the armour of the soldier in the middle? It’s a Targeryn seal.
In the current timeline of the show, there’s nobody loyal to House Targeryn so this could be a flashback to Robert’s Rebellion against the Mad King.
Is he? Isn’t he?
This fuzzy blob looks awfully familiar.
Ice ice baby
Since Bran can’t walk, we’re presuming that this is a chilly vision of what’s to come.
Will The Wall finally fall?
“Apologies for what you’re about to see”
As we all know, the dead body of Maester Aemon of the Night’s Watch was burned on a pyre – just like every other crow that takes the black.
So why would Ser Davos be prepared to fight and die over Jon’s deceased corpse? Somebody must have bigger plans for Jon Snow.