Rick Ross cuts his own lawn to avoid $1 million bill
M-m-m-m-m-mow that lawn!
If you don't get that reference I refuse to apologise.
Speaking to Forbes, Rick Ross apparently mows his own lawn to save on the $1 million a year bill it would take to hire a gardener to sort out his 235-acre estate.
Admittedly, as much as it is some effort to maintain all that yourself, it would be more impressive if he didn't just go down to John Deere and buy "the biggest tractor, the most efficient tractor". It's hardly pushing around a lawnmower from B&Q is it?
Ross said he went down to the American company and "told them I had 200-plus acres that I wanted to keep cut, and they pointed out the right tractor [...] I bought it right then and there. I bought the extended attachment on the back that would cut even wider".
He went on to say: "I may have sat in the same spot for two hours before I got everything working, but once I got it going, I didn't stop. I cut grass for about five hours."
I've always been looking for an excuse to sit on one of those big boy lawnmowers where you basically just drive around until it's done - turns out all you need to do is make a load of money big enough to have a ridiculously large garden. Who knew?
We're not going to sit here and slag off a rich person for balling out with their millions - we've done plenty of it already - but it would be slightly more endearing if the celebratory post after all his hard work wasn't just product placement for a bunch of posh bottles of booze.
Nevertheless, we can't knock him for putting in the graft himself and, by all accounts, he really enjoys it. He recommended that everyone should take the time to mow their own lawn, describing it as "such a great and peaceful sensation."