It’s been a rough few years for Hulk Hogan.
Following his last official match in 2012, he’s had a sex tape leaked, along with audio of him using racial slurs, which led to WWE dropping his Legends contract – which in turn then led to successfully suing, and bringing down Gawker.
Since then though, he’s existed as a nostalgic celebrity punchline, a naff shill flogging t-shirts from his beach store in Florida, and unwittingly retweeting pictures of footballers after pranksters tell them that they’re family photos.
Yesterday however, he tweeted probably the greatest tweet that has ever been tweeted on Twitter.com:
I'm am never drinking again brother HH
— Hulk Hogan (@HulkHogan) September 4, 2017
Let’s just break down what makes it so incredible:
1: Just the idea of Hulk Hogan going out on a massive sesh, then really feeling it the morning after.
2: “I’m am”.
3: The fact that the Hulkster still finishes all his sentences with “Brother”.
4: The fact that he signs off his tweets with “HH”.
5: Probably the best thing is that he’s going through that moment we have all experienced after those truly messy nights. That feeling of “Right, that’s it. No more booze. I don’t need it. I’m gonna start eating healthy as well. Maybe finally go vegetarian. Go to that yoga class that that girl at work is always saying you should go to. Tidy the flat. Read more.” All that jazz.
Seeing this larger than life, satsuma-coloured superhero of the 80s reduced to the same existential faux-epiphany most of us go through about once a month is strangely wonderful.
Only water ,coffee and iced tea brother from now on,brother HH
— Hulk Hogan (@HulkHogan) September 4, 2017
6: The fact he was almost definitely back on the beers by 7pm the next day.
7: The fact he also uses it as a chance to shill his discontinued line of energy drinks.
And many a Hogan Energy if I start making them again!!! HH
— Hulk Hogan (@HulkHogan) September 4, 2017
What have we done to be blessed with such a tweet? To be honest it probably even overtakes this gem from Richard Keys last week as the best tweet of the year so far.
So the window 'slams shut' today. Count how many times you hear that said. Truth is it simply 'closes'.
— Richard Keys (@richardajkeys) August 31, 2017
