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03rd Feb 2017

Gabriel Jesus has already admitted to farting on a Man City team mate

That's one way to introduce yourself.

Alex Finnis

At most football clubs, you imagine there is some kind of pecking order when it comes to the dressing room.

There are the top dogs who own the place, all the way down to the kids who are mostly there to clean boots and wipe arses rather than play any actual football.

There are some players you can mess with, and some you can’t. You wouldn’t catch anyone changing Sergio Ramos’ music in the Madrid dressing room or mocking Ronaldo’s clothes, as much as he might deserve it.

On a slightly similar, but not-really-that-similar note, we imagine there are also some players you can and cannot fart on.

Image: Clive Rose / Getty

Say you’re Manchester City new boy Gabriel Jesus – you’re probably not going to go up and fart on Vincent Kompany or Sergio Agüero – that’s not really on.

But Fabian Delph? No one really cares about Fabian Delph.

We imagine that’s what Gabriel was thinking after his new club thrashed West Ham 4-0 in his first start on Wednesday.

He scored one and assisted another in a very impressive full debut, and apparently couldn’t contain his excitement as the final whistle went.

As they were walking off the pitch he told Fernandinho in Portuguese: “I just died man, I’m done. I just farted, right over there on Delph.”

The admission was picked up by TV cameras, and posted by ESPN’s Brazilian Facebook page.

You can see Fernandinho totally failing to stifle his laughter.

Poor Fabian…