Search icon


03rd Jul 2018

England fans are absolutely fuming at how Colombia tried to stop Harry Kane’s penalty

Kyle Picknell

It was absolute shithousery and it’s just not on boys. Not against Big Gaz’s men

First of all, why is Carlos Sanchez trying to grapple with Harry Kane in the penalty area like it’s the last slow dance at the school disco and he has never kissed someone before?

Secondly, why are all the Colombian players arguing for a VAR viewing, as though the ref would just change his mind after seeing a slow motion replay of the above?

I can’t answer the first question really, other than knowing that after watching a full season of his performances at Aston Villa (when we got relegated, obviously), Carlos Sanchez is absolutely 4,000,000% prone to complete and utter headloss, I don’t know, roughly about once every football match.

Sometimes it’s an all too casual backpass, sometimes it’s giving away a penalty with the exact type of reckless defending that you’ve seen give away countless penalties at THE TOURNAMENT YOU ARE PLAYING IN.


Anyway, the answer to the second one is easier. The Colombian players were complaining so vigorously so they could surround the referee, who was conveniently standing near the spot, and purposely scuff up the area where Harry Kane was about to take the kick.

As you’d expect, England fans weren’t happy. How fucking dare they try and stop football coming home. The cheek of them.

And also as you’d expect, Harry Kane dispatched the penalty as cool as you like.