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03rd Jul 2017

Seven reasons why Jeremy Corbyn is the actual Prime Minister


Jeremy Corbyn and Theresa May

It’s amazing it’s even in doubt.

If you weren’t paying close attention to the General Election results, you may have missed one important fact. Jeremy Corbyn was elected as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Don’t believe me? Even Tory MPs think agree.

If your immediate response to this news is one of disbelief, so allow me to explain how and why it is Jeremy Corbyn, not Theresa May, who is the actual Prime Minister.

  1. The defeat of Lord Buckethead and Elmo wasn’t all it was cracked up to be

Think back to the evening of June 8 and the morning of June 9. Some people will still insist that Theresa May and the Conservatives won, but did it feel like a victory for them? Did Theresa May look like she won? Go with your gut on this. Picture to her shellshocked expression as she, having vanquished Lord Buckethead et al, delivered her speech onstage at the Maidenhead count. Savour it. Whilst Corbyn was returning victorious to Labour HQ, she had the air of someone who’d just received an erroneous £900 porn bill.

  1. Would the PM really get owned in PMQs? 

After being elected Prime Minister, Jeremy Corbyn has upped his game in the chamber. Gone are the stilted PMQs performances in which questions were asked on behalf of Maureen from Stockport, and of jokes falling flat. Corbyn now owns the House of Commons. On his first appearance since the election, he entered to a standing ovation from his MPs. And with that new swagger has come some fantastic zingers. On his first speech after the election, he asked May if she agreed that “democracy is a wondrous thing that throws up some unexpected results” and reiterated that Labour are ready to offer “strong and stable leadership in the national interest.”

Even getting John McDonnell is getting in on the act. There was a time when you might expect a typical McDonnell gag to fall flat. Remember his Mao’s red book prank?

Post-election, we are treated to stone cold classics such as “The Tories need to sort themselves, because when we get into government we will need an effective opposition.” The boys are back in town.

  1. New threads for Jezzer

Has anyone else noticed Corbyn’s sartorial overhaul? It was in a debate about welfare cuts – what else? – that Oxfordshire househusband David Cameron famously told Corbyn to “put on a proper suit and do up your tie.” And what fantastic advice that was. The beige tones and visible vests of old have been replaced with a standard uniform of a sharp blue suit coupled with an obligatory red tie.

  1. Who is actually dictating policy?

The Queen’s Speech is traditionally where the Government sets out its policy agenda. This year’s failed to feature almost every key policy from the Conservative manifesto: the scrapping of the pension triple lock, social care reforms, grammar schools, fox hunting, and changes to the winter fuel allowance. He’s done it unconventionally, but clearly Jeremy Corbyn has had more of an impact on the policy agenda than Theresa May has. I bloody knew he would.

Corbyn has also flexed his policy muscles since then. In the immediate aftermath of the Grenfell Tower fire, he called upon empty properties to be made available within the same postcode for surviving residents. Days later, 68 flats were made available in a luxury Kensington development.

  1. Public mood vs public feud

Perhaps it was in the aftermath of the Grenfell Tower fire that the public came to realise that Jeremy Corbyn was the actual Prime Minister. After all, is it not the role of the PM to reflect the mood of, and to empathise with, the mood of the people whom he or she serves? Whilst Theresa May was meeting fire service top brass behind closed doors, Corbyn was on the street listening to residents and promising to hold to account those responsible.

  1. If America says it, it must be true

For all their failings, America knows a leader when they see one. And after yet another terror attack – this time outside a mosque in London – The New York Times featured on its front page Jeremy Corbyn meeting those affected. Neither Corbyn nor May had been featured on the cover during the election.

  1. If political pundits say he’s not then he almost definitely is

There are people who are literally paid to commentate on politics who have been wrong about almost everything in living memory. Those people are good barometers, and they are mostly saying that Jeremy Corbyn is NOT currently the Prime Minister which proves that he, in fact, is.