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Comedy

29th Nov 2021

Anti-mask song about ‘farting in your trousers’ is so stupid people can’t believe it’s real

Danny Jones

Anti-mask song on London train

We’d sing along but we can’t quite remember the lyrics…

A group of anti-mask protestors have released a song on social media and we can’t accurately measure the level of cringe it hits – nor clearly ascertain which alternative hellscape it came from.

Led by infamous covid denier and Jeremy’s brother Piers Corbyn – who was part of the massive anti-vaxxer protest in Trafalgar Square earlier this year – the anti-mask song is carried out by what we can only assume is a fellow cohort of anti-vaxxers and lockdown protestors who essentially flash-mobbed the London District Line train.

Well, there needs to be at least some people paying attention for it to be a flash mob, we suppose – but you get the point.

Regardless, since masks are set to once again become compulsory on public transport and while shopping from Tuesday 30 November, they came up with this:

It’s got to be those immensely catchy and inventive lyrics for us, not to mention how in-time everyone is.

As you can hear, the song mainly consists of repeating the phrase: “Wearing a mask is like trying to keep a fart in your trousers” alongside the ‘No More Lockdown’ campaign slogan: ‘Resist, Defy, Do NOT Comply.”

As the protestors stroll down the (largely empty) carriage, Corbyn then proceeds to peel off a sticker advising people to wear masks, before declaring: “Tell ‘New World Order’ we’ve never followed any of your mandate tax and we never will”.

Yes, the elder Corbyn brother is of the belief that a secret totalitarian government is trying to tell us what to do and that he and the anti-lockdown movement must protect us from such crimes.

In case you need a reminder as to just how committed Corbyn Sr is to this clearly vital cause, here is a video of him being more than willing to pivot to the tune of £10,000:

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=3962510397210847

We’ve watched the so-called ‘music video’ more times than we’d care to admit at this point – and we only have one question: what are they going on about?

Just in case you were wondering, wearing a mask to help prevent the airborne dispersal of droplets that can contain viruses and bacteria is not the same as “trying to keep a fart in your trousers,” as these folks rather amusingly put it.

It’s more like this:

In fact, while you may smell one on the train from time to time, you’re always wearing a mask on your arse: they’re called underpants and trousers – the very subject of this song. Moreover, they typically help prevent microbes from travelling far enough or in large enough quantities to cause any kind of infection.

As those on social media quickly demonstrated, even the slightest extrapolation of logic makes it all the more easier to ridicule than it already is.

Masks are there to protect you and others. Agreed, they may not be everyone’s preferred way to ride public transport or shop – but it’s about thinking about someone other than yourself.

Anyway, don’t worry, some bloke fixed it:

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