17 things you'll know if you have £0 in your bank account
1. Sleep is a good choice for dinner, because sleep is free
Photo: matthew098 / Nickelodeon
And you're not hungry when you're asleep!
2. If you're feeling creative, the reduced section is a great place to get ideas for meals
Tonight we're having turkey breast, served with a cucumber and jam doughnut garnish, followed by gluten-free cake and a big bowl of sadness.
3. There's a special kind of agony in your life: looking at your bank balance
4. The feeling you get when finding a surprise fiver is almost indescribable
I don't know what it's doing in my lunch and I don't care - it's a fiver!
5. Toast is your best friend. Toast will always be there for you, at breakfast, lunch and dinner
Presenting: the toast sandwich. It's like a regular sandwich, but without wasting any money on a tasty filling.
6. You've never once set the Amazon filter to 'High to Low'
Why does it even have that option?
7. Even though you know that whatever you were thinking about buying will just sit in your basket forever
Neeeever gonna happen.
8. When all your friends are ordering Dominos, there's only one choice for you when it comes to pizza
And that's on a good day.
9. When you go to the pub, it's less about which beer you'd like and more about which beer's price is closest to zero
Photo: 20th Century Fox
10. Paying for things with loose change is a regular occurence
Photo: Brett Sanders
11. There are days when you consider taking some drastic measures
12. Your socks don't have holes, they just have extra ventilation
13. Even when it's below freezing, the heating doesn't go on
Parka + pyjamas = parkajamas. See? Deprivation can be fun, too.
14. Being poor means you have to get creative when you need things that you don't have
15. This is your reaction when non-poor friends suggest going to the really pricey bar for drinks
Cocktails are nice, but you know what else is nice? Drinking White Lightning in the park. Anyone fancy drinking White Lightning in the park?
16. Your ultimate dream is to be able to buy something and not think "Shit, I shouldn't have done that"
17. But for now...
Feature image: @BeingMrsC / Amazon