New research shows were you rank in the world for penis size

Depending on what you're packing, this will make you rather feel smug or pretty inadequate.

A new study published on Target Map shows the average size of erect penises (penii?) around the world, and they've even colour-coded a world map so you know exactly where in the world the biggest and smallest wangs are prevalent.

Due to the metric system, the information is provided in centimetres rather than inches, but it still gives you a handy comparison of country-by-country knob length. According to the data, the UK doesn't do too badly, with a median member size. We sit alongside the United States, France and Germany in the middle-table position (so we're like the Everton of dicks), with typical penis sizes ranging between 12.9 and 14.7 centimetres.

If you're wondering who's mixed up in the rod-size relegation scrap, it's India and the likes of Thailand and Malaysia. They're either the smallest or the most honest of course.

As for the biggest, well it seems that West Africa is the most noticeably well-endowed region of the world with an average of between 16.1 and 17.9 centimetres.