Poundland's £7 Valentine's dinner is the perfect way to say "I love you, but not that much"
Valentine's Day is coming up.
The pressure is starting to build. You've got to put a magical evening together for you and your partner, but oh no! There's only £7 in your bank account.
Immediate complications (How did it come to this? What am I going to do? Is this the way I die?) aside, £7 won't get you a table in a top restaurant, nor will it pay for a movie and some popcorn.
Well good news, my financially bereft friend. Poundland has the solution for you.
The retailer has put together a menu using products available from Poundland stores - a three-course meal that will run you a mere £7.
So what's for dinner?
Starter: Crab bruschetta antipasto
This is fancy talk for 'crab on bread'. Consisting of a tin of crab meat on top of a pack of tomato and oregano bruschetta, this starter is certain to get your date in the mood for love.
Main: 'Spaghetti' and meatballs
'Spaghetti' is a bit of a lie here: it's actually a Pot Noodle, specifically two beef and tomato Pot Noodles, topped with a can of Bachelor's meatballs and a tin of peas. Delicious!
Dessert: Ferrero Rocher
It's Ferrero Rocher - you can't go wrong. Even if the first two courses are a disaster, you can scrape it back with some tasty chocs.
So there you go. No need to go out to some fancy Italian restaurant and pay over the odds for pasta. No need to order a nice bunch of flowers from a posh florist. Just chuck this lot in the microwave and you'll be laughing.