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25th Dec 2016

Girlfriend of man attacked by PlayStation-hating cat claims the pet is a bit of a dickhead

Nooruddean Choudry

It seems as though feline/human relations are at an all-time low.

By now, you’ll no doubt already have seen the dramatic (and we feel bad for saying it, but hilarious) footage of a man opening his brand new PlayStation under his Christmas tree, losing his shit with excitement…and then nearly losing an ear.

For whatever reason, a feline foe in the general vicinity took exception to the ecstatic giftee’s loud shrieks and went on the offensive, taking him down like an WWE wrestler…with really really sharp claws and lightning reflexes.

It was very painful for the chap in question, but piss funny to watch (in an admittedly cruel way)…

Now the fella’s other half has spoken out about the incident – and she has left us in no doubt about who she thinks is to blame. Whilst some have criticised the human for startling the creature, thus causing it to attack him so violently, Jessica Freeman insists that the cat in question has previous.

Indeed it’s fair to say that she paints the domestic animal as something of a dickhead, who lashes out at every opportunity…

She states:

Y’all, this is what pure joy looks like. Also terror. Merry Christmas!

*This has resulted in a trip to the doctor and stitches. We love him and genuinely hope he feels better. It’s just nice to be able to laugh with your best friends.

DISCLAIMER: The cat lives in a good home. Plenty of pictures of him being spoiled. He’s a jerk. Seriously. This is not the only person he’s attacked. He wasn’t “provoked”. A grown up was acting overly excited as a joke and the cat walked across the room then back. He wasn’t “startled”. You can clearly see him walk up and calmly sit while planning his attack. Also, this is not my cat. No reason for me to lie. He is a jerk. Take your threats somewhere else. You can report me for animal abuse all you want. It’s. Not. Mine. And it’s not abused. A human was attacked here, not a cat.  Only in 2016 would people blame a person who didn’t touch an animal for getting attacked by said animal bc they were excited.

**Yes, this is the entire video. It was filmed with snapchat and could only have been 2 seconds longer anyway.

***Pictures have been added from last night with the PS4 and cat both in them. Anyone who actually reads can see they’re fine.

We reckon this is going to run and run. At the time of writing, the cat was unavailable for comment.