When it comes to the pinnacle of modern music, I think we can all agree that Smash Mouth's 1999 hit 'All Star' cannot be topped.
It is the anthem of a generation, immortalised in classic ensemble film
Rat Race and timeless animation
Digimon: The Movie.
And, while it might not be the
most remixed track ever, it is certainly subject to some of the best mashups on the internet.
From this...
https://twitter.com/cool_as_heck/status/804796246909030400
To this...
https://twitter.com/cool_as_heck/status/803750722747539456
And, of course, the crème de la crème of the genre.
https://twitter.com/cool_as_heck/status/804087776199086080
But just how ubiquitous is 'All Star'? Why is it that everyone has heard it multiple times, yet no one has ever actively decided to listen to it?
Why is it that everyone knows all the words but no one can explain why?
With that in mind, I decided to carry out a little experiment.
https://twitter.com/tomvictor/status/806507697071919104
1. Divinyls - I Touch Myself
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wv-34w8kGPM
This is actually how the experiment came about. The 1990 masterpiece was mentioned on Twitter and I decided to give it a listen on the grounds that 'it has been a while', and a while it has been.
Due to a combination of inertia and laziness, I let YouTube play the next couple of tracks in the queue. After I was treated to Fountains of Wayne's magnum opus 'Stacy's Mom', those unmistakeable opening bars of 'All Star' rung out. How strange and unexpected.
It was at this point I decided to put it to the masses.
Number of clicks (or in this case, 'clicks'): Two
2. Avril Lavigne - Sk8er Boi
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIy3n2b7V9k
My suspicions were heightened further still when someone tweeted me to say they tried the experiment by starting with Avril Lavigne's authentic punk rock classic Sk8er Boi.
Not only another two-for, but another where Stacy's Mom acted as the bridge. There is some deep voodoo shit happening on YouTube, I'm telling you.
https://twitter.com/rharrison744/status/806508469272641537
Number of clicks: Two
3. Fastball - The Way
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0wfu3tOrtQ
This was my first real foray into the experiment. Could I establish an immediate link? I'd need to lay some ground rules. When you're doing serious science, you need to take science seriously.
The 'Smash Mouth Number' would be defined as the number of tracks that played before 'All Star' appeared on the right of the screen without selecting a previously-played track.
This meant I would have to think carefully about the type of song that would lead me to my goal. If I had to choose between 'Purple Rain' and 'Still D.R.E.', which would bring me closer to that sweet, sweet Smash Mouth?
So, for 'I Touch Myself', the number is two. Same for 'Sk8er Boi'. And for Fastball we get... more of the same: two songs again! Albeit via similarly late-90s 'Closing Time' by Semisonic.
I imagine the recommendations differ for each user, so you may well end up with different options if (ok, when) you try it yourself.
It could just be a genre thing, of course. There was more testing to be done.
Number of clicks: Two
4. Kelis - Millionaire
https://youtu.be/8qImH-0UCHI
Time to switch it up. There's no obvious connection between Kelis and Smash Mouth, with the exception of both having put out timeless classics in 1999 (hers was 'Caught Out There', for those who were wondering.
Millionaire came out in 2004, the same year Smash Mouth were treading water with the lesser-heard 'Always Gets Her Way', the title of which sounds like an anthem for men's rights activists.
So, down to business. 'Millionaire' leads to Outkast's 'Ms Jackson' and on to Afroman's 'Because I Got High' (a song once
covered by Chris from TV quiz show Eggheads, if you didn't already know).
Next up is 'Tribute' by Tenacious D, and I'm starting to worry my six degrees of separation offshoot will fall at the first serious hurdle.
I don't know why I was worried. I look to the right, scroll down, and there it is.
Number of clicks: Four
5. The Supremes - Baby Love
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAWSiWtUK2s
This one would be tougher, I was sure of it.
Not only a different genre, but a different generation altogether. I'd have to choose carefully this time.
Scrolling down past more Supremes songs, I spotted what might be the key - 'Good Vibrations' by the Beach Boys. It's similarly present in '90s and '00s pop culture, despite being several decades old, so maybe... just maybe.
At first glance it's not good news, just more and more Beach Boys tracks. One of those, 'Wouldn't It Be Nice', leads me to Chubby Checker's 'Let's Twist Again', the Bee Gees' 'Stayin' Alive' and MC Hammer's 'U Can't Touch This'.
I'm finally in meme territory, but time is running out. When 'All Star' doesn't appear on the right, and I start to sense defeat.
I click through to the second Outkast track of this project, 'Hey Ya', and there it is, the jolly face of Smash Mouth beaming at me on the right.
Number of clicks: Six
6. Luciano Pavarotti - Nessun Dorma
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTFUM4Uh_6Y
Right, this should sort me out. There's no way I can get from Pavarotti to 'All Star' that quickly...or is there?
As I look to the right, it's much of a muchness. Pavarotti...Pavarotti...Mario Lanza...Pavarotti...but wait. Could
this clip from what I believe is the Bulgarian version of The X Factor hold the key?
The answer, dear reader, is 'almost'.
My problem is that it then takes me three clicks to get out of reality show auditions, eventually landing on Louisa Johnson's Clean Bandit collaboration 'Tears'. After that it seems like plain sailing, or at least it ought to be.
From 'Tears' I get to '24k Magic' by Bruno Mars, followed by Mars' bigger hit 'Uptown Funk' and Gwen Stefani's 'The Sweet Escape', at which point the sidebar is full of everything
but 'All Star'.
'Barbie Girl'? Check. 'MMMBop'? Check. 'The Bad Touch'? Ch-ch-check. Putting this one down to a glitch in the matrix - I won't accept defeat that easily.
Number of clicks: As yet undetermined
7. England 1970 World Cup Squad - Back Home
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ag_ujTfx3ak
On the other end of the spectrum to Pavarotti, you have the genre most objectively devoid of musical quality - songs by international football teams.
While 1990's 'World in Motion' was salvaged by a John Barnes masterstroke, 'Back Home' is a much more stolid affair. But how close are England's All Stars to the band who immortalised the term?
Early signs are promising, with the first link - 'Vindaloo' by Fat Les - leading to Smash Mouth contemporaries B*Witched and their certified banger 'C'est La Vie'. Surely the comparably existential musing on self-expression (stop giggling at the back) would lead to you-know-who in no time.
I'm now experienced enough in my YouTube sleuthing to know that the way forward is to look for the nearest available American band, so 'Teenage Dirtbag' by Wheatus it is.
And from there, in between Blink 182's 'All The Small Things' and Sum 41's student night staple 'In Too Deep', is the pièce de résistance.
When I see Steve Harwell's sunglassed face staring down at me, I know I have made it. My work here is done.
Number of clicks: Four
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_jWHffIx5E
