A spectacularly cringe-inducing American TV movie about Harry and Megan is on tonight

"I'm, uh, kind of the Prince of England"

Suits actress Meghan Markle is marrying former soldier Harry Windsor this weekend. It’s going to be all over the TV. You’re probably already aware of all this. You’re either getting your Union Jack onesie dry-cleaned as we speak, or are planning to off the grid and avoid all media on Saturday. If however, you need a primer on Prince Harry and Meghan’s courtship so far, then fear not. The good folks at the Lifetime channel – who previously gave us 2011’s William & Kate (38% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes) - are showing the American TV movie Harry and Megan: A Royal Romance, and it is sure to be the greatest televisual moment since that guy had a melt down on Come Down With Me. The movie was been widely panned following its airing on US TV on Sunday night. Indiewire said the “depiction of them as overtly sexual beings veers into icky, transgressive territory”, and CNN called it “unconvincing in places”. Viewers on social media seemed more excited by a CGI lion being intercut with scenes of the late Princess Diana. https://twitter.com/cutebookworm10/status/995845199443255296 https://twitter.com/amber_lcarter/status/995824103616647168 Tbh, that sounds pretty awesome and definitely worth watching. Giraffes also appear to play an important, symbolic role in the story. The leads do look the part. The actress playing Meghan is actually pretty convincing, though Harry comes across more as a ginger Jack Whitehall. https://twitter.com/lifetimetv/status/995820096772886528 The guy playing Prince William though? He looks more like snooker player Steve Davis. And I'm pretty sure Kate Middleton is played by Michelle Heaton of Popstars: The Rivals and Liberty X fame. Plus this actually happens. [facepalm emoji] Here's the full trailer. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1v0BgiYgHE Harry and Megan: A Royal Romance is on Monday night on Lifetime, at 8.10pm. Lifetime is on Sky channel 164, Virgin channel 208, and BT channel and TalkTalk channel 289. Don't pretend like you don't secretly really want to watch it.