Man with a permanent marker and a love of penises goes wild in IKEA

These things happen.

You should always expect the unexpected when you go to IKEA. You plan to pick up cutlery, and you come home with a new couch, a bedside lamp, two funky jam jars and a hipster print from the 80s. However, anyone who paid a visit to the IKEA in Aalborg in Denmark recently would have seen something extremely unexpected... a lot of penises. Don't worry, they weren't actual penises, they were drawings of penises, 30 to be precise. Yeah, just like Jonah Hill's character in Superbad. The 31-year-old vandal found a pen and drew small genitalia on the walls and furniture in the shop. He was spotted on CCTV by security who passed his information on to the police. They eventually tracked down him down and he admitted to drawing some of the penises but not all 30 of them. He said someone else did it first and he just started drawing penises after being inspired. The man received a suspended sentence of 20 days for the offence. We hope we never have to write the word 'penises' again.